iPromise
by starrtrek
Summary: Sequel to iWon't Let You Down. It's senior year, but college seems to be the last thing on Freddie Benson's mind. Fencer Spencer/Freddie Cam Carly/Sam slash femslash
1. The Senior

**Title: **iPromise

**Fandom:** iCarly

**Main Ship:** Spencer/Freddie

**Other Ships:** Carly/Sam, TBA

**Genre(s): **Romance/Angst

**Rating: **T for sexual content and language

**Warnings: **person under 18 in a relationship with someone over 18, slash, femslash, angst

**Author Note:** So here is the sequel to iWon't Let You Down! If you haven't read that story yet, PLEASE DO. Otherwise, none of this will make sense.

The last story was set during the spring of Freddie's junior year, and now we start up around September of his senior year, about four or five months after iWLYD ended.

Enjoy!

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"Alright, everyone stand in a line right in front of the green screen," Freddie ordered the seniors, pointing to the large lime colored screen directly behind the group of kids. The kids obeyed, sidling up next to each other and started to make funny faces. Freddie rolled his eyes.

"You guys, Miss Briggs wanted the shot to show the 'serious commitment of our 2012 seniors'. How is sticking your tongues out serious?" Freddie asked, quirking an eyebrow. Towards the middle of the line, Sam leaned forward, sticking out amongst the mass of students around her.

"It was serious for her when she was sticking her tongue into Mr. Howard's mouth," Sam joked, grinning. "She might have made him sick!"

The seniors chortled to themselves as Sam beamed in triumph. Luckily, neither Miss Briggs or Mr. Howard were in the room, otherwise Freddie knew that Sam would have been given a one way ticket to detention. Freddie couldn't help but chuckle at his friend's comment, something he noticed his other friend Carly was doing as well from next to Sam. Carly tucked a dark strand of hair behind her ear, eyeing her girlfriend Sam in the same way Freddie used to look at Carly. Freddie was long used to Carly and Sam's abnormal relationship. He lived with Carly in her apartment, so he was constantly catching the two girls kissing on the couch. It was a sight he was used to.

When Freddie's mom had died the previous Spring, her will had come in a few months later when Freddie was at school. Freddie was pulled out of class to be told he would be living with his Aunt Sharon on the other side of Seattle. Naturally, Freddie protested. He even called an extremely close friend of his that happened to have gone to law school (even if only for three days). The friend happened to be Spencer Shay, Carly's older brother and Freddie's unofficial boyfriend.

Spencer came to the school immediately dressed in a fancy suit and found a loophole in the law. After a heated argument between an intimidating female social worker and a devoted Shay, Freddie was allowed to stay at Spencer's for the remainder of his high school career. As it turned out, Auntie Sharon didn't want him around the house anyway, although she remained his legal guardian.

Triumphant, Freddie had the best summer of his life with Spencer, Carly and Sam. Sam stayed over nearly every night and the four of them would stay up late and play games like What Am I? and Would You Rather?. It was sort of like a double date, seeing as Carly was dating Sam and Freddie was with Spencer, but it never felt like that. It just felt like four friends hanging out.

Spencer was especially happy about his little sister's newfound sexuality, but he did restrict the time that Sam spent alone with Carly. He often made sure Freddie stayed with them, but this usually never worked because Freddie would be forced to persuade Spencer to let him stay with him. And Spencer could always be persuaded.

Everyone was happy. Freddie felt more happy than he had in awhile. His mother had died in such a freak accident and he knew it would always damage him. But being with Spencer and having good friends distracted him from the pain, if only for a little while.

Gesturing for the seniors to pose for the picture, Freddie lifted a finger to snap the shot. Carly suddenly stepped forward, crossing her arms. Freddie cast her a confused look, to which she replied, "Come on, Freddie, you're in this class too. Get in the picture!" Freddie gave her a wry smile and put the camera on a ten second count down. He then ran up onto the stage of the auditorium where the kids were lined up and settled into a spot between Sam and Carly.

"Smile, Fredward," Sam told him, elbowing him lightly. Freddie laughed, grinning broadly as the camera flashed. He would later edit the background to look like something amusing, say, maybe the moon, or Principal Franklin's pants. Freddie looked around at his smiling classmates, bursting out into laughter at the sight of a shirtless Gibby running amok around the auditorium. He put an arm around both of his friends, marching them out of the theater as his classmates snapped pictures of everyone as they left.

"This year will be one to remember," Carly said sentimentally, waving to Wendy as she passed by. The first day of school always felt like a paparazzi attack, but it was even more so for the seniors.

"Yeah, this is my last year of school," Sam said fondly, slipping out of Freddie's arm as she reached her locker. Carly did the same. "No more teachers and no more effing homework," Sam told them, looking towards Mr. Howard and Miss Briggs congregating in the hall.

"What, no college for you, Sam?" Freddie asked, knowing the reply. Sam's grades were abysmal. Her best grade was a C- in gym.

Sam laughed. "College? Hell, I can barely handle high school. I'll probably just stick around here for a little bit, or maybe go to L.A and become an actress. iCarly would look good on the app," Sam explained, yawning as she poked a piece of chicken she had in her Gary Coleman grill perched in her locker. Freddie thought he saw a look of disappointment pass through Carly's face, but he wasn't quick enough to catch it.

Sam pulled the chicken out of her locker, taking a bite. "Anyway, I have to go home. My mom wants me to meet her newest boyfriend. She thinks he's the one," she rolled her eyes, closing her locker. Carly giggled.

"The guy with the unibrow?" Carly asked. Sam grinned.

"Yep, and he's a UPS delivery guy to boot," Sam told her, smiling as she leaned in to peck Carly on the lips. "I'll come by your place later tonight."

"Okay, see you," Carly murmured, blinking slowly as Sam stepped away and headed towards the main doors. Carly sighed as she closed her locker shut, twisting the lock to erase her combination.

"Are you okay, Carly?" Freddie asked, putting an arm on her shoulder. She looked back at him and nodded, smiling weakly.

"Don't worry about me. I'm just a little dazed. It's senior year. Where did the time go?" she asked rhetorically, shrugging to herself. Carly then adjusted her backpack over her shoulder as she and Freddie left school together. "Are you visiting your Aunt Sharon tonight?"

"No," Freddie replied as Carly got into the passenger seat of Freddie's car. Since they lived in the city, the trio decided that only one of them would need a car. Since Freddie had inherited a lot of money from his mother, he seemed to be the smartest choice. Sam didn't even have her license. The car was used, but it ran good, and it got them places. Freddie slid into the driver's seat, putting the key in ignition as he added, "Spencer and I are making dinner for you and Sam tonight."

Carly gave him an incredulous look. Freddie smirked. He couldn't cook to save his life. Spencer on the other hand was a fantastic cook. Freddie usually just helped him out, or as Sam put it, be Spencer's kitchen sex slave. That was a bit of an exaggeration. In fact, Freddie and Spencer had never had sex, so Freddie's v-card remained in his wallet. But could Freddie help it if Spencer_ sometimes_ got sauce on his chin and Freddie wanted to clean it off with his mouth? No, it could not be helped. Spencer was just too damn adorable when he cooked.

Freddie drove away from the school, heading into downtown Seattle. Carly had plugged in her earphones and Freddie could hear her listening to the newest David Archuleta song. Freddie tuned it out, preferring not to be distracted while he drove. Freddie wasn't too keen on driving, even after having his license for a year almost.

As he pulled into the parking lot at Bushwell, Freddie spotted Lewbert screaming at some mother and her little daughter. He tried to park as far away from the warted man as he could. Reaching an ace parking spot near the front of the building, Freddie parked the car, stepping out as Carly pulled her earphones out and followed suit.

"He should not be allowed near children," Carly commented, pointing at Lewbert with a disgusted expression on her face.

"He should not be allowed near _society_," Freddie corrected, laughing as Carly nodded furiously in agreement. The two of them walked into the lobby, chatting about their first day back and how likely it would be that Sam could get Miss Briggs to resign, something that had been her life ambition since the sixth grade. Shaking in laughter as they got in the elevator, Freddie had to lean on Carly to keep himself upright. The two managed to calm themselves at the elevator opened to the quirky and artsy Shay/Benson loft.

Carly threw her bag on the couch, groaning. "I feel all gross from school," Carly complained, heading towards the stairs. "I think I'm going to take a shower."

"Go for it," Freddie told her, setting his bag down more neatly on the kitchen table. "I'll be down here when you get out."

Carly nodded and bounded up the stairs. Freddie began pulling out text books from his bag and placing them on the table. His homework load was luckily light, so he only brought his AP Calculus and AP English books home. He then walked over to the fridge to grab a water bottle. Taking a sip, Freddie moved back towards the table, setting down the bottle as he stared down at his books.

Two arms suddenly snaked around Freddie's waist as he stood at the table. Smiling, Freddie leaned back, his head hitting a firm chest. "Hello, Spence," Freddie greeted. He was answered by a kiss on the side of his neck. Chuckling, Freddie turned around in the embrace, facing Spencer. Spencer had a paintbrush tucked behind his ear and a yellow paint splotch on his right cheek. Freddie shook his head. "You're such a mess."

Spencer grinned ruefully. "But you love me anyway, right?" he asked, keeping one hand on Freddie's waist as he reached his other hand up to cup Freddie's cheek.

Freddie nodded once, a slow smile creeping on his face. "Too right," he responded. Spencer beamed as he leaned down to press his lips to Freddie's. Freddie returned this kiss, putting his hands on Spencer's chest. Spencer prodded Freddie's mouth with his tongue. Freddie let him in, letting their tongues meet in a tangled tango. Freddie brought a hand up to get caught in Spencer's hair. Spencer moaned lightly before pulling away. Freddie pouted.

"Do your homework, Freddo. We can't have you getting bad grades and ending up at Tacoma Community College," Spencer told him, letting him go and stepping away. "You're definitely Stanford material."

Freddie turned back towards the table. "Or MIT," he added in a low whisper that he was sure Spencer couldn't hear. College was a tight conversation for Spencer. Freddie tried to bring it up as little as possible, but it was difficult seeing as Freddie was a senior and was therefore thinking of college 24/7.

After awhile, Carly came down the stairs and started her work as well. She wasn't in AP Calc like Freddie, but she was in AP English, so they worked on that together. Spencer picked up Carly's copy of Wuthering Heights as they worked on some questions.

"I haven't read this book since I was seventeen," Spencer told them, shaking his head and sighing. "Time really does go by fast, huh?"

"Not fast enough," Freddie muttered distractedly, erasing something on his paper. Carly looked up, grimacing at Freddie.

"Senior year is supposed to be the best year of high school," Carly stated, placing her pencil down as she reached for Freddie's bottled water.

Freddie shrugged noncommittally. "I'll just be happy to finally get out of Seattle," he looked back down at his paper, missing Spencer squirm uncomfortably. Carly glanced at her brother, giving him a look before returning to her work.

A sudden buzzing sound filled the atmosphere. Freddie looked up, annoyed, as Spencer pulled his Pear Phone out of his pocket and glanced at the screen. Spencer's expression flickered slightly, but he didn't respond to the text message. He slipped it back into his pocket and walked around the counter, his back facing the teens.

"Who was that?" Carly asked, chewing on the end of her pencil as she read something on the page in front of her.

Spencer didn't turn. "Just…Socko," he said plainly, turning on the sink as he began to prepare dinner. Freddie glanced up at this piece of information. He could almost feel the faded scars on his wrist twitching at the sound of Socko's name.

Freddie would feel bad about Spencer completely ditching Socko for him if he didn't hate Socko so much. Socko with his perfect manners and perfectly blonde hair and Aryan blue eyes. Socko with his cool inventions and Socko with his over 18 ID. Socko was everything Freddie was not, and he had been so paranoid the last time Socko had come over in the spring that Freddie had taken a blade to himself. Spencer made him swear never to do it again under any circumstances, and Freddie hated breaking promises to Spencer.

It wasn't Freddie's idea to cut Spencer off from Socko; it had been Spencer's himself. The gesture was overwhelming. Socko and Spencer had been best friends (and perhaps lovers) before Freddie even knew what sex was. But Spencer wanted to prove his affections for Freddie, and by doing so, he decided to spend less time with Socko. Less time turned into no time at all, and the little text messages and midnight calls from Socko were nothing out of the ordinary. Freddie always felt awkward whenever Spencer's phone rang, but he tried to avoid the conversation. Freddie knew he was the one at fault.

Carly nodded at her brother's response, not saying a word. Freddie knew Carly wasn't a fan of her brother's ex-lover. Carly herself had had a hard time adapting to her new sexuality, and Freddie knew she blamed Spencer in the beginning, but she was now finally accepting who she was. However, Carly knew how much pain Socko had caused Freddie, so she stuck to the side of her best friend.

Freddie felt a sour taste in his mouth. He didn't want to be one of _those_ people. You know, the kind that forbid their significant others from everything they find threatening. Freddie just didn't want to lose Spencer.

When it came to Spencer and Freddie's relationship, Carly was on a 'don't ask, don't tell' policy. She knew how illegal their bond was, but she also knew how happy it made her best friend and older brother. Carly accepted them, but she made it clear that she wanted no part in viewing their 'sexcapades'. Spencer had laughed at that while Freddie had chuckled awkwardly, changing the subject quickly.

After a few more minutes of work, Freddie helped Spencer in the kitchen. Sam arrived just as they were finishing up. They had made shrimp fettucini.

As the four ate, the girls discussed school and grades and teachers. Spencer asked questions every now and again. Freddie remained silent, swirling the shrimp around in his plate. He felt a hand on his knee. Freddie looked up to see Spencer looking at him softly, his mouth curved into a small smile. Freddie reached under the table to lightly intertwine his fingers with Spencer's. The two held hands under the table as the girls bickered over whether or not Gibby would be shirtless when they arrived to school the next morning.

After Sam left at around nine, Carly went to her room, bidding good night to the boys. Freddie brushed his teeth in the hall bathroom as Spencer washed the dishes from dinner. When Freddie was done he left the bathroom, heading towards the room he and Spencer shared. He didn't quite make it.

Spencer pushed Freddie into the wall in front of the door, his eyes gleaming with a manic and hungry attitude. Freddie felt a tightening in his midsection as Spencer pinned his wrists to the wall, leaning down to suck the skin between Freddie's shoulder and neck. Freddie moaned, closing his eyes as his head rolled back into the wall. Spencer kissed up Freddie's neck until he reached his lips, kissing him ravenously.

Freddie let his tongue glide across Spencer's bottom lip, receiving access to Spencer's mouth. Spencer's tongue darted out to meet Freddie's. Freddie felt Spencer's hands slide down his arms slowly. His breath hitching slightly, Freddie watched as Spencer glided his hands down Freddie's chest and eventually stopping at his belt. Spencer tugged at the belt, unloosening it and pulling it from Freddie's waist.

"Spencer…" Freddie moaned, turning his head from Spencer. Spencer went back to kissing Freddie's neck as he unbuttoned Freddie's jeans. The snapping sound brought Freddie back to reality. Freddie placed his hands on Spencer's chest and pushed him away lightly. Spencer groaned, placing his forehead against Freddie's.

"You're killing me, Freddo," Spencer murmured, breathing heavily through his mouth. Freddie was panting also, trying to recapture the feeling of his legs. Freddie leaned in to catch Spencer's bottom lip between his own, biting down softly. Spencer moaned in his mouth. "Tease…" he whispered, smiling softly against Freddie's lips. Freddie smiled back before ducking under Spencer's arm and walking into the bedroom. Spencer followed suit, shutting the door behind him.

"You know, I find it ironic how just a few months ago you were trying everything to get into my pants, and now it's the other way around," Spencer commented. Freddie shrugged, pulling off his shirt and slipping out of his jeans. He reached into the drawer in the room that belonged to him and pulled out a pair of sweatpants. Spencer usually just wore whatever T-shirt he had been wearing that day and his boxers. Spencer hadn't finished speaking. "I also find it funny that we've been sleeping in the same bed for four months but haven't actually _slept _together."

"What, you only want me for my body?" Freddie joked, half turning to give Spencer a flirty look. Spencer laughed loudly.

"Is that a problem?" Spencer retorted, crawling into the bed and pulling the covers up over him. Freddie watched him in awe for a moment before following his lead. Freddie snuggled up to Spencer, resting a hand on the older man's stomach as he leaned his head on Spencer's chest. Spencer sighed contentedly. "You do have a nice body."

"Thanks," Freddie yawned, closing his eyes. "Good night, Spence. I love you."

"Love you too, Freddie," Spencer replied, kissing the top of his bed before reaching over and turning off the lamp in the room.

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**A/N: **Ahh that was looooong. Wow. But yes, this is the sequel. There's a LOT, I repeat, a LOT of fun plot twists coming your way, so stay tuned! Also, my sixteenth birthday is on Monday August 23rd. Want to get me a present? Review! :)


	2. The Stranger

**Title: **iPromise

**Fandom:** iCarly

**Main Ship:** Spencer/Freddie

**Other Ships:** Carly/Sam, TBA

**Genre(s): **Romance/Angst

**Rating: **T for sexual content and language

**Warnings: **person under 18 in a relationship with someone over 18, slash, femslash, angst

**Author Note:** Sorry for the wait! School is starting soon and I won't have much time to write, but hopefully I can keep this up.

Enter magical evil plot twist #1! What will it be? Spencer has an eleventh toe? Sam is moving to Arkansas? Freddie is actually straight? Nope, none of those. But I'm sure you won't expect it.

Also, THANK YOU for the birthday wishes. My birthday was AWESOME, I got my permit, AND…Nathan Kress wished me a happy birthday! Life is complete. :)

* * *

For the rest of the week, Freddie and Carly fell into a routine. Freddie would wake up next to a knocked out Spencer every morning at around 6 o clock. He would then get changed and go wake up Carly. By 6:30, the two would be at the table eating breakfast when Spencer would wake up and surf the internet. At around 6:45, Carly would go upstairs to straighten her hair, and at that point, Spencer and Freddie had their 'morning ritual' which included making out on the couch until Carly came down at 7. Then the teens would leave for school.

On Friday afternoon, Freddie returned to the loft alone. Carly and Sam had gone to the Gibson's house to pick up something with Gibby. They would then be driving in Gibby's car to come back to Bushwell to rehearse an iCarly.

Freddie threw his bag on the couch and sat next to it, putting his head back on the cushions to relax. It had been a long week. Senior year was incredibly demanding, especially if you were in all AP classes like Freddie.

Freddie heard footsteps coming down the stairs, followed by an angry voice.

"Come on, Richard, I built it exactly like you told me to!" Spencer was shouting at a disgruntled looking man as they came down the stairs. Freddie turned on the couch to observe the scene.

"No, the bumper is purple, _purple_!" the man snapped, reaching for the door. "I wanted it _blue_!" With that, the man slammed the door, leaving an aggravated Spencer leaning up against the door.

"But I ran out of blue paint…" he trailed, sighing into the wooden door. Freddie stood up as Spencer turned around, pressing his back against the door as he saw Freddie. "Oh, hey Freddo. Didn't see you there."

"What was that all about?" Freddie asked, stopping in front of Spencer.

Spencer rolled his eyes. "Mr. Parkinson downstairs wanted a model car sculpture for one grand, and I messed it up," Spencer complained, crossing his arms. "I needed that money!"

"I'm sorry, Spence," Freddie murmured, reaching out to pull Spencer's arms out of their crossed position and intertwined his fingers with his. Spencer shrugged, allowing himself to be handled.

"It's fine," Spencer replied, leaning into to kiss the top of Freddie's head. "It's just not easy trying to get enough money to pay off Carly's first year of college. With her grades, she could get into some really expensive schools."

"But she's applying for scholarships, and with iCarly on her app she is bound to get a few," Freddie assured him, squeezing his hands tightly. He didn't like when Spencer was frazzled.

Spencer nodded, watching Freddie closely. "How are you going to afford college?"

Freddie hesitated; how could he tell Spencer that he barely had enough money for one semester at Stanford? He couldn't let that be on Spencer's conscience. Besides, Freddie didn't want Spencer to start working for him too. Taking a deep breath, Freddie said, "I've got it taken care of."

Spencer gave him a quizzical look, but he let it go. Trying to change the mood, Freddie let go of Spencer's hands and brought them to his face. "So, where were we this morning?"

Spencer grinned, and leaned down to kiss Freddie. Freddie wrapped his arms around Spencer's thin waist as Spencer pulled Freddie into him. Spencer kissed Freddie's jaw, teasing the skin with his tongue. "I think we were right…here," Spencer moved his hand down Freddie's chest and stopped at Freddie's midsection. Freddie's breath caught in his throat as he stared at Spencer's hand. Spencer looked into Freddie's eyes lustfully as he moved his hand even more far down. Freddie gasped at the feeling of Spencer's hand on his crotch. Every pleasure he had ever experienced didn't equal this.

Keys suddenly turned in the lock behind Spencer. Jumping, Freddie backed away from Spencer, falling onto the couch. Spencer watched him amusedly as the door opened. Carly, Sam and Gibby walked in, laughing about something, but they stopped at the sight of a hassled looking Freddie on the couch.

"What's the matter, Fredward? You look like you just got raped," Sam commented, laughing along with Gibby and Carly. Freddie just sent her a glare before standing back up. Spencer shuffled awkwardly. Carly placed her bag on the chair and walked to the kitchen, pulling out some limeade.

Sam moved on. "Gibby, why don't you go upstairs and get into your costume? Carly, Freddie and I will be up in a minute," she told Gibby. He nodded and went up the stairs.

Spencer frowned. "I thought iCarly rehearsals were on Saturday nights," he commented, moving towards the kitchen to grab a glass of limeade from his sister. Sam shrugged.

"Gibby won't be home tomorrow night and we need to run over some stuff with him," Sam explained, but then she eyed Spencer coyly. "Don't worry, Freddie will be back down in an hour or so."

Spencer rolled his eyes, but glanced nervously at the ceiling. Freddie knew why. Since their relationship was illegal in many aspects, Spencer and Freddie had restricted the existence of their status to just Sam and Carly. Gibby had no clue that Spencer and Freddie were together, or that Spencer and Freddie even liked guys. Whenever Gibby came over, Spencer would have to turn a cold shoulder towards Freddie to prevent any clues from escaping their body language. Obviously, Spencer wasn't too keen on having Gibby over much.

Freddie got off of the couch. Before he could go to Spencer, Sam grabbed his arm and pulled him towards the stairs. Carly put down her juice and strode over to them, grabbing Freddie's other arm.

"You can see Spencer in an hour," Sam repeated, trying to hold back the struggling Freddie.

"Sam, you're being immature-" Freddie started.

"Do you want Gibby to find out and tell his mom?" Sam asked threateningly, eyeing Spencer. Spencer just shrugged.

"Go upstairs, Freddo. I'll be here when you get back," Spencer said, smiling slightly. Freddie sighed and allowed himself to be towed upstairs by the girls.

After a long hour of making Gibby take a peanut butter bath, iCarly rehearsal was finally finished. Carly and Sam headed downstairs while Freddie was forced to clean up the studio. Gibby had left early, claiming the peanut butter had caused a serious rash on his chest. Freddie mopped the ground sourly, wondering what Sam and Carly were doing that was too important for them to help him clean. From the sounds Freddie could hear coming from Carly's room, he had a pretty good idea of their activities. Groaning, Freddie threw the wet mop on the floor and fell into one of the bean bag chairs, exhausted.

There was a knock on the studio door. Freddie glanced up to see Spencer standing at the doorway holding a banana. Freddie waved him in. Spencer opened the door, smiling briefly as he closed it behind him. "I brought you a snack before dinner," Spencer explained, tossing the banana to Freddie. "I would've gotten some for Carly and Sam, but the door to her room is closed and I really don't need to see what's going on in there," Spencer said, rolling his eyes. Spencer sunk into the chair next to Freddie's, watching him eat.

Freddie only took one bite of the banana. He kept his eyes on Spencer as he placed the banana on the ground next to him. Spencer returned his stare, but questionably. "What are you staring at, Freddie?" Spencer asked softly.

Freddie wanted nothing more than to land one right of Spencer. He knew he shouldn't, but he wanted to so badly. Spencer looked so cute with his short hair trickling in front of his eyes. His had a bright red shirt on and tight dark jeans. Freddie wanted to feel the denim. He could feel himself itching to touch Spencer.

They had made an agreement to limit the amount of fooling around they did. No matter how much they cared for each other, it was illegal, and the less they made out, the better. But this didn't stop Spencer from going all hormonal on Freddie every now and then. Not that Freddie minded. Freddie wasn't usually the one to initiate it, but he suddenly wanted to.

Freddie leaned forward and kissed Spencer flat on the mouth, pushing him back into the bean bag chair. Spencer responded enthusiastically, wrapping his arms around Freddie's waist as Freddie hovered over him. Freddie didn't remove his lips from Spencer's as he reached for Spencer's shirt and pulled it off of him. Spencer breathed sharply, watching Freddie throw the shirt aside. "Wow, Freddo, what happened?"

"Shut up," Freddie responded in a whisper, pressing his lips to Spencer's. Normally this forward behavior was reserved for Spencer, and Freddie would never indulge in this urge while the girls were home, but Freddie was so aggravated with Sam and Carly that he didn't even care if they walked in. Freddie kissed Spencer's jaw line, all the way up until his lips were at Spencer's ear. He teased the skin there with his tongue. Spencer moaned, his hands moving to Freddie's jeans. Freddie gasped as he felt Spencer cup him. Closing his eyes, Freddie moved roughly against Spencer's hand, letting out a low groan. Spencer's breath quivered as Freddie buried his face in Spencer's neck, sucking on the skin.

"Careful, Freddie," Spencer warned, flustered. "Don't leave a mark."

"I don't care," Freddie replied, biting into Spencer's neck. Spencer cried out in a mixture of pain and pleasure, gripping Freddie's midsection tightly. Freddie hissed slightly, but moved his lips up to Spencer's again, tackling his tongue with his own. Spencer pushed Freddie up and then flipped him on to the floor next to the bean bag chair. Spencer climbed on top of him, pinning his wrists to the floor.

Freddie traced Spencer's bare chest with his fingers, pinching his nipple. Spencer moaned, straddling Freddie as he leaned over him, kissing his chin. Freddie leaned up to lick Spencer's lips. Spencer's tongue darted from his mouth, meeting Freddie's as they grinded against each other. The two boys moaned in unison. Spencer reached for Freddie's jeans once more, unbuttoning the strap. Freddie couldn't think straight. All he could feel was Spencer's hands on him. Freddie felt Spencer's hand graze his member through his boxers, and he almost lost it there. This was it. He was going to let Spencer have his way with him.

The elevator door pinged suddenly, disrupting the entire lustful mood. Spencer jumped up like a cheetah that had just been electrocuted, leaping off of Freddie to grab his shirt from the floor. Spencer slipped back into it as Freddie reached down and clumsily re did the button on his jeans. Spencer ran a hand through his hair, and then another through Freddie's, trying to make it even. Freddie then watched Spencer plunge back into the bean bag chair, resting his hands on top of his lap. Freddie did the same.

It wasn't that Carly didn't know what Freddie and her brother did together. They slept in the same_ room_ for Pete's sake. But Spencer didn't like letting Carly see him at his most vulnerable. Freddie understood completely. He had been caught just months ago making out with someone and it was a terrible feeling. Well, that and it was Spencer who had caught him.

The elevator opened as Sam and Carly sprang out, looking around. "Spencer! Where's dinner? Momma's hungry!" Sam complained, rubbing her stomach. Carly caught sight of them in the bean bag chairs. Her eyebrows raised. Freddie could see why. He was sure Spencer looked anything but calm.

"Spencer?" Carly asked, nearing him. "Are you okay?"

"Dandy," Spencer replied promptly, smiling weakly. Carly didn't look convinced. She opened her mouth to ask something, but a bell sounded throughout the entire apartment. Freddie glanced around, confused.

"What was that?" he asked. Sam looked equally bemused. Carly laughed.

"It's the doorbell, smarties," she giggled. Freddie realized he had never heard the doorbell ring once in the past four years of hanging out at the Shay apartment. People normally walked right in or knocked.

Carly glanced at Spencer. "Do you want me to go get the door?"

Spencer nodded slowly. "That would be…fantastic," he managed, his breathing returning to normal. Carly shrugged at Sam as they left the studio. Freddie let out a deep breath. He couldn't help but laugh at Spencer's tight expression.

"You should've seen your face," Freddie laughed, pointing at Spencer. Spencer threw a pillow at him before standing up, straightening his pants out.

"That was close," Spencer said, glancing at the elevator before shuddering slightly. Freddie stood up as well. Spencer turned his gaze back to him.

Freddie held up his hands in defense. "Look, about what just happened…"

Spencer waved a hand. "Don't worry about it, I lost my composure, too," Spencer admitted, smiling. He then cleared his throat. "But maybe it'd be best if we didn't, um, do that while Carly is home, or, you know, we could end up, um…doing something we regret," Spencer told him, looking at him knowingly. Freddie nodded, slipping his hands into his pockets. There was an awkward silence. Then-

"Freddie!" Carly's voice called up the stairs. Freddie sighed and looked at Spencer. He was still severely turned on, and wanted nothing more than to resume where they had left off, but that would have to wait. Freddie shrugged and made his way out of the studio, closely followed by Spencer.

When Freddie reached the bottom of the stairs, he noticed that Carly and Sam were not alone in the living room. A man was standing at the counter with the computer, observing a yellow gummy bear light. When Spencer asked, "Whats going on?" the man turned around. The man was older than Freddie, older than Spencer even. He looked to be a little less than forty. He had blonde hair and was a pretty attractive man. Freddie stared at him, unsure of who he was. But the man looked back at Freddie, a proud and lingering glaze covering his eyes.

The man stepped forward. "Hello, Spencer. You probably wouldn't remember me," he said, putting his hands in his pockets. "You were twelve the last time I saw you. Your mother wasn't even pregnant with Carly yet," he glanced at Carly, who looked puzzled. Spencer took a step off of the stairs, cocking his head to the side. Then, his eyes widened.

"Oh, my God," Spencer murmured, his jaw dropping. The man nodded, smiling lightly.

"Yes," he said, and then returned his gaze to Freddie, looking at him warmly. "Hello, Freddie. I'm your father."

* * *

**A/N:** AHH bet you didn't see that one coming! Review and let me know what you WERE thinking of, because you may be right about something that happens later on ;)


	3. The Truth

**Title: **iPromise

**Fandom:** iCarly

**Main Ship:** Spencer/Freddie

**Other Ships:** Carly/Sam, TBA

**Genre(s): **Romance/Angst

**Rating: **T for sexual content and language

**Warnings: **person under 18 in a relationship with someone over 18, slash, femslash, angst

**Author Note:** carly4713 - Yes! He replied to me via twitter and said, "Have a rockin 16th birthday!" I think I just about died. And I just got my very own red Gummi light today! It's the same one from iCarly. I'm looking at it right now - it's amazing.

Did you guys hear about the new episode on the 11th? It's the one with Sam's mom. I can't wait to see it, but I wish they'd air the episodes in order. I'm 100% sure that iDo was supposed to be after iGot A Hot Room, not iSam's Mom. But, as long as we're getting new iCarly episodes, I'm happy.

Oh and BTW, I envision Freddie's dad as Neil Patrick Harris (ironic, I know). I'm dumping a lot of angst on you guys in this chapter, but you're used to it by now, right?

* * *

The apartment had grown increasingly quiet since the arrival of Freddie's dad. Freddie had sunk to the ground, sitting on the bottom step of the stairs. Spencer was hovering by the counter, his back turned to the living room, his head ducked down. Carly was sitting nervously in the chair near the door, glancing back and forth from Freddie to the man standing in the middle of the living room. Sam wasn't even eating, although she sat at the kitchen table.

The man cleared his throat. "I'd expect you'd want to know my name," he said apologetically. "I'm Dean Strauss."

"I don't care what your name is," Freddie replied lowly, not looking at his 'father'. Freddie knew that Benson was his mother's name (the Fencin' Bensons was good enough proof), even though everyone automatically called her Mrs. Benson. Freddie had never truly missed having a father in his life. His mother was always content (except for that one time she dated Lewbert) and Freddie often forgot about having a dad. Sam didn't have one, and Colonel Shay was never home, and no one knew what was wrong with Mr. Gibson. Freddie was never around father figures. There was a time when Spencer was one to him, but that obviously wasn't the case anymore.

Still, Freddie didn't feel angry towards Dean. He knew he should've, but for some reason, all he wanted to know was the truth. Freddie looked up, his eyes meeting Dean's. "Can you please just…tell me?"

Dean clearly knew what Freddie was referring to. He gestured for Freddie to sit next to him on the couch. Freddie stood warily, taking a step off of the stairs to approach Dean. Spencer snapped into action.

"Stop, Freddie," Spencer warned, striding over to throw a protective arm in front of Freddie, "you've been gone for eighteen years, Dean. You can't just come back and expect a warm welcome," Spencer then glared, his eyes flashing. "You know damn well I don't trust you."

"Spencer!" Carly reprimanded, looking shocked. Freddie knew why. Spencer didn't normally swear around his younger friends, or at all, for that matter. Freddie had gotten used to it, but it still alarmed him every time Spencer swore.

Dean sighed, looking at the ground. It was then that Freddie noticed what Dean was wearing. He had a very designer looking suit on with a v neck white shirt underneath. His shoes were shiny and black. Freddie knew this man must be extremely wealthy. Not that that really mattered, but it was something worth noticing.

Freddie ducked under Spencer's arm, not looking back at his startled and slightly betrayed looking boyfriend. "I want to know," Freddie decided, coming to stand next to his father. Dean smiled briefly. Freddie sat on the couch while Dean perched on the coffee table. Spencer took Freddie's spot on the stairs, gripping his head tightly in his hands.

Dean took a deep breath, but looked around. He seemed slightly disturbed. "Are you sure you want me to tell you all of this in front of these people?" he asked, sounding a little condescending. Freddie scowled.

"These people happen to be my family," Freddie retorted, crossing his arms. Dean straightened as Sam walked over, cracking her knuckles threateningly as she sat on the couch beside Freddie. Freddie gave her a small smile that she returned. Dean looked flustered.

"I'm sorry, Freddie, I didn't mean any disrespect towards your friends," Dean apologized, holding his hands up. Freddie shrugged. Dean glanced once at Sam before looking back to Freddie, keeping his gaze.

"Well, it all started about twenty years ago. I was in college at the University of Fresno in California. I was young and stupid, but I had a dream in mind; I wanted to be a high paid doctor," Dean began, chuckling slightly. "I didn't want to go through all the years of training that I needed to become a doctor, so I tried to cut some corners, ah, illegally," Dean stopped there, glancing at Spencer, who had just scoffed. "Suffice to say, the university wasn't happy. They would've expelled me if I wasn't so damn smart."

"I don't understand. Where does my mom come into this?" Freddie asked, confused.

"Your mother probably never told you this, but she was a nursing professor at the University of Fresno when she was in her twenties. The University made me become her apprentice because they knew she'd never let me step a toe out of line again," Dean said, fondness entering his tone. "Your mother was a piece of work. I hated her when I first met her. She made me disinfect my hands every time I touched a heart monitor," he chuckled slightly, then his tone became distant. "After awhile, we began spending more and more time together…we had late nights and early mornings nearly every day…she was a brilliant nurse…"

"By my sophomore year, I was more than infatuated with her. Me, a nineteen year old dork. When I wasn't nursing, I was nearly always playing some video game or fooling around with computers," Dean said. Freddie caught Carly's eye, who looked as though she was suppressing laughter. "But Marissa saw past that. She saw my true value as a doctor."

"But you were her student!" Freddie said incredulously. How could his mom have been one of those teachers that slept with a student?

Dean smiled. "You never had a crush on a teacher? You've never been head over heels for someone way past your age range?" Freddie squirmed uncomfortably on the couch, not daring to look back at Spencer. "We all want the forbidden. When we can't have something, we try hard to get it. It's just the way the human mind works," Dean explained, shrugging. "Your mother and I became an item. Secret, of course. But I knew I loved her, and I wanted to marry her, even if she was eight years older than me…"

"But of course, the inevitable happened. Marissa got pregnant, and I got scared. I was a twenty year old kid at the time, and I was going to be a father! She refused to abort the baby, but she knew she'd have to leave Fresno before things got out of hand. Marissa resigned and moved north so that she would be far enough away from Fresno, but still on the West Coast and near me. She loved me too, you see. She knew I'd be a successful doctor some day, which I am," Dean straightened proudly, raising his chin.

"While she was pregnant, I used to visit her in Seattle as much as I could. She thankfully lived across the hall from a very nice man, Steven Shay," Dean tilted his head toward Spencer. "Steven helped Marissa along with the pregnancy when I couldn't. Well, he did until his own lady became pregnant a few months later," Dean looked at Carly. "Steven told Spencer to take over, which he did."

"I was twelve," Spencer hissed, standing up suddenly. "I was there when Mrs. Benson was in pain, when she wanted ice cream, when she had insomnia…I did everything you didn't," Spencer circled around the couch, his eyes narrowing on Dean. "I was a child and you let my father make me into some sort of slave doing the work _you _were supposed to be doing."

Dean stood up as well, matching Spencer's threatening stance. "Your issues with your father are not my fault," Dean snapped. "It's not my problem that your father hates you for driving your mother away."

There was a loud cracking sound as Spencer's fist connected with Dean's face. Freddie gasped, standing up abruptly. "Spencer!" Freddie and Carly both shouted in unison. Sam was up in an instant, pulling Dean back as Freddie stepped in-between the two.

"Spencer, please," Freddie pleaded, wanting to hold Spencer himself, but knowing it'd be unwise to do so in front of Dean. Carly held Spencer's arms back, gripping them tightly. Spencer looked wild.

"Did you hear what he said!" Spencer shouted, trying to free himself from his sister's arms. Freddie glanced at Dean, who was cupping his face, looking down. Freddie looked back at Spencer, quickly grabbing his face.

"I heard what he said, but I need to know the truth," Freddie let out in a rush, and then he paused, frowning. "I can't believe you knew this whole time and never told me," Freddie said, bruised. Spencer looked into Freddie's eyes, his expression becoming tender.

"Freddie, I-"

"God, Spence, you really hit him hard!" Sam said jubilantly, prying Dean's hands away from his face to look at the red mark.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Strauss, Spencer didn't mean to-" Carly started, but Dean laughed mirthlessly as he backed away from Sam.

"Oh, he meant it, Carly. Want to know why? Because it's the truth," Dean spat out, rubbing his face angrily. The punch seemed to have landed on his final nerve. "He drove his mother insane with his wacky sculptures and his messy room and his bad grades. Whenever your father left for the Air Force, your mother would be alone with Spencer 24/7. It's enough to drive anyone insane," Dean straightened out his clothes as he spoke. "No wonder it took twelve years of convincing her to try and have another kid again."

Spencer sunk to the couch, burying his face in his hands. Dean was nowhere near finished. "After she had you she left and never came back. That's why you don't have a mother, Carly. Spencer drove her away! And now your father can't stand him for it."

"You need to leave," Carly snapped, her entire body trembling. Freddie shook his head.

"No, I need to know what else happened," Freddie argued, turning back to Dean. "I understand how upset you are that Spencer hit you, but please, Dean, just tell me what you needed to say and then get out."

Dean took a deep breath and rested by the stairs. "There's not much left to the story. Marissa decided that I wasn't fit to raise her child and I went back to school. But I did promise her that once I became successful I would come back around your sixteenth birthday and help you out with money and things," Dean then smiled for the first time in the tense minutes. "I have plenty of money to help you get through any college you want to go to, Freddie."

Freddie hesitated; he really needed the money. But how could he let someone who brought out such a vicious side in Spencer into his life? Freddie didn't know what to do. "So…why are you here now?" Freddie challenged him, changing the subject. Dean suddenly looked downcast.

"I heard that Marissa died," Dean said in a small voice. "I had to come. I just…I had to. Freddie…I never stopped loving her. Or you. I've loved you my entire life and you haven't even known," Dean whispered, sounding a little soft. "I want to make amends for not being there for you."

Freddie said nothing. He stared at the ground, not knowing what to think of everything. His mother had never told him this. Spencer had never told him this. Freddie felt like his whole life was a lie.

Sam then stepped forward, shocking everyone. "I think Freddie needs time to sort this one out, Doc," she said, looking serious. "Why don't you leave your number here and Freddie will call you once he's processed everything?"

Dean nodded, reaching for a pen and paper to write down his number and email. He then walked towards Freddie, clapping a hand on his shoulder. "Be in touch, son," Dean nearly begged before exiting the apartment. Freddie collapsed on the couch next to Spencer, holding the paper Dean had slipped into his hand tightly. Carly turned to him.

"That man is awful, Freddie. You shouldn't have anything to do with him," Carly said angrily, glaring at the closed door. Sam nodded feverishly in agreement. Spencer did nothing. Freddie sighed.

"I don't know…Some of the stuff he said was out of line, but he's my dad, you know?" Freddie rubbed the back of his neck. "I just need time to think."

"He didn't want anything to do with you, Fredbag," Sam commented, biting into an apple she had just picked up. "Maybe you should do the same to him."

Freddie shrugged. He was extremely burned out. Freddie just wished that he hadn't been interrupted from what he and Spencer had been doing in the first place. Then he wouldn't have to know anything about his dad. Freddie glanced at Spencer. The older man hadn't moved his hands from his face.

Carly seemed to notice too. "Spencer, you know he was lying," Carly assured him, leaning down to hug her brother tightly. "He's just a big nub," she said, tucking her head into his shoulder. Spencer squeezed her back and then drew away. His eyes looked red, but not like he had been crying; it just looked as though he had been pressing his palms into them.

"It's fine," Spencer said quietly. Sam chomped on her apple, chewing loudly to make the situation less awkward. Carly then backed away and headed toward the kitchen.

"I'll make us dinner, okay?" she called from the kitchen, and began banging pots and pans together. Sam joined her in the kitchen. As soon as the two were out of sight, Freddie reached for Spencer's hands.

"I'll figure this out, Spence," Freddie told him, trying to peer into his eyes. Spencer wouldn't look at him. "You know I still love you, right?"

Spencer cracked a smile. "I know. I'm too adorable _not _to love," he joked, finally looking at Freddie. Freddie leaned in and kissed him softly.

"Exactly my thoughts," Freddie murmured.

* * *

**A/N: **Okay, so I want to explain a few things. One would be the whole Spencer/angst/parents deal. In the show, whenever Colonel Shay calls Spencer, he always seems to have a 'tude with Spencer, which I feel is as if he thinks his son is a shame. I'm just building off of that and making it ten times worse. Hey, I'm a fanfic writer, I can do that. :) But trust me, that whole issue isn't one of the main problems in this story, and will most likely be nothing but mentioned from here on out.

The next would be that this whole situation is based on something that happened to me recently (not as intense as this, thank the Lord). I had a godmother I never knew existed until recently when she emailed me that she wanted to meet me and come back into my life. And she's filthy rich, like Dean. But I'd love her anyway :)

And I just want to clarify something. In the last story, Spencer mentioned that he had never known his mother. This was kind of an oops! on my part. I didn't know of this plot until I finished that story. So just ignore it. Spencer really didn't know his mother well, so that's what he meant before. He did know who she was, though.


	4. The Date

**Title: **iPromise

**Fandom:** iCarly

**Main Ship:** Spencer/Freddie

**Other Ships:** Carly/Sam, TBA

**Genre(s): **Romance/Angst

**Rating: **T for sexual content and language

**Warnings: **person under 18 in a relationship with someone over 18, slash, femslash, angst

**Author Note:** HAI guys. So school has pretty much taken over my life, but I still can find time to write. Here's a lengthy, juicy chapter for you. I can't keep away from my fics for too long. Speaking of which, you guys should check out my newest iCarly story, iVirus. It's pretty intriguing (of course :P) but sadly no Fencer (plenty of Creddie, Seddie and Spam on the way, though!) so check that out if you'd like. I'll be updating that one soon. I just wanted to update iP first. I'll also probably post a one-shot collection of all these random couples (including Fencer) so be on the look out for that!

Freddie's dealing with MAJOR internal conflict in this chapter. Poor Fredbag.

On to the story! I have to finish this quick - Vampire Diaries season 2 comes back tonight! Yay!

* * *

The week following the shocking visit from Dr. Strauss proved to be very tense for Freddie. When he wasn't focusing on his school work or doing iCarly, Freddie was sitting on the fire escape or some other random spot thinking over his life. He used to do this quite frequently when his mother died. Now that Dean was back in Freddie's life, he resorted to slinking away from his friends by becoming a hermit. It wasn't right, and Freddie knew that, but he needed to think.

Dean was a complex man. He seemed good, but Freddie could so distinctly remember the look on Spencer's face when he laid eyes on him. Freddie had never seen Spencer so repulsed by a person before. But Dean was offering Freddie something he really needed; money. Freddie needed money to fulfill his dreams of going to college at MIT, or even Stanford. He knew it was wrong to take the money from Dean without even accepting him, though. That's why Freddie had to put up with it.

Freddie had barely spoken to Spencer all week. Whenever Freddie returned home from school, Spencer would be working on a sculpture or out at an art show while Freddie was buried up to his nose in homework. By the time Freddie and Spencer could sit down to eat dinner, the girls would be there and make it impossible for them to get any intimacy. Plus, Freddie would always rehearse iCarly after dinner, and by bed time he was too tired to do anything with Spencer. They slept next to each other every night, and yet Freddie felt as though Spencer was in a completely different building.

Early on the Friday morning after Dean's visit, Freddie woke up to an empty bed. He stared around, squinting in hopes of finding Spencer sitting on the small couch or at his desk. The room was empty. That was odd. Spencer was usually always asleep when Freddie woke up. Freddie was a morning person. Spencer was a bit of a night owl.

A familiar buzzing sound ripped Freddie out of his confusion. He spotted Spencer's phone vibrating on the night table on Spencer's side of the bed. Socko's name lit up on the screen. Freddie glanced at the door once before reaching over to grab the phone. He knew it was wrong; Spencer hated people reading his text messages. He was one of _those_ people. But Freddie was curious to see why Socko was texting Spencer so early in the morning.

Freddie was greeted by a large paragraph of text:

_listen, spence. i know things have been busy at home with you and carly and freddie, but would you please just talk to me? i know we're done. i've accepted that. i don't know why, but i got the message. i knew this would end eventually. but don't shut me out, bro. we're best friends, and we'll always be. i'd rather be your friend than nothing at all. i'll always love as more than that and i know you will too. but please talk to me, spencer. love you. socks._

Freddie shuddered._ love you… _the very words made Freddie want to throw the phone out of the window and watch it fall eight stories. It just reminded Freddie that Spencer had once been in love with Socko. But was he still? Gripping the phone tightly, Freddie leaned back against the headboard, sighing. From the look of the message, it seemed Spencer had never told Socko about Freddie. Freddie felt okay with that. He'd rather not have Socko hunt him down and stab him repeatedly.

Freddie stared at Spencer's pillow, recalling the expression on Spencer's face when he had come home to find a wrecked Freddie on the couch with an angry Carly. Freddie closed his eyes. The look had been unbearable. Freddie knew Spencer would do anything to make him happy. Freddie felt ashamed that he was indirectly forcing Spencer to dump Socko altogether. Deep down, he knew Spencer missed Socko just as much as Socko missed Spencer. It killed him, but Freddie knew it was true.

Freddie deleted the text message promptly, setting the Pear Phone aside on the night table. He quickly got changed for school and left the room, heading to the bathroom to brush his teeth. When he returned, he spotted Spencer and Carly eating breakfast at the table already. Freddie smiled at the two of them briefly before grabbing a box of Fiber Nuts from the table and pouring himself a bowl, sitting beside Carly.

"Morning, Freddie," Carly said brightly, grinning. Freddie nodded back, but his eyes were on Spencer. Spencer looked extremely tired, but he managed to give Freddie a lopsided smile.

"Why do you look like someone's been stealing your coffee?" Freddie inquired, pouring milk into his bowl. Spencer yawned widely.

"I pulled an all-nighter. I made that as a result, though, so I'm satisfied," Spencer pointed at a large clay flower in the middle of the apartment. Freddie must have missed it. It was a giant sunflower.

"Cool," Freddie replied enthusiastically, trying to sound excited and supportive. Maybe it would make him feel less guilty about erasing Socko's message. Spencer raised his eyebrows slightly in suspicion but was too tired to argue. Carly gave him a questioning look. Freddie didn't feel any better.

Carly stood up, stretching. "I'm going to go grab my books and then we can go, okay, Freddie?" Without waiting for an answer, Carly cleaned her plate and left it on the counter, heading up the stairs to her room. Freddie took this opportunity to lean across the table and kiss Spencer firmly on the mouth.

"Woah there, Freddo," Spencer chuckled, pulling back slightly. "You're acting like you won't see me again for three years," Spencer laughed, and then looked serious. "That's not true, right?" His tone was wary.

"No!" Freddie responded, shaking his head to prove his point. "No, not at all. I just…well, I…you know…miss you," Freddie said lamely, looking down at his lap. Freddie felt Spencer cup his face. Freddie looked up, finding Spencer's eyes looking gently into his own.

"I've missed you too," Spencer murmured, "and that's why I've decided we're going on a date tonight."

"A date?" Freddie asked, surprised. "Dates are for normal people."

"I think we can manage one night of being normal," Spencer said dryly, pecking Freddie on the lips before standing up to clear his bowl. Although Freddie had only been eating for a few minutes, he joined Spencer at the sink, washing out the remainder of his milk and Fiber Nuts.

Freddie watched Spencer as he cleaned the dishes. His dark hair was growing out again, falling perfectly over his eyes. Freddie had always admired Spencer's hair. He remembered staring at Spencer's long hair when they were tracking down Bigfoot and being mesmerized by it. Now, it looked like it had when the two of them had started fencing. Long, but short at the same time. Freddie liked it that way.

While staring at Spencer, Freddie realized how much he really did love him. Freddie didn't know what he would do if Spencer was still in love with Socko. It would damage him beyond all means. But Freddie had to appreciate Spencer for what he was now. And he was Freddie's.

Spencer caught Freddie staring and quirked an eyebrow. Freddie busied himself with the dishes.

Carly came strutting down the stairs, hoisting her bag over her shoulder. "Okay, Freddie, let's go. I think we have an assembly first period," she told him, brushing her hair with her fingers to tame it. Freddie nodded at her and turned to Spencer.

"See you tonight," Freddie said, leaning up to kiss Spencer. Spencer kissed him back, smiling down at him.

"Later, Freddo," Spencer said, winking. Freddie felt his stomach erupt with butterflies, but he forced himself to move away from Spencer and towards the door. He left with Carly to go to school.

* * *

After a long day of work and classes, Freddie returned home, slightly nervous for his date. He threw his bag on the couch hurriedly and headed to Spencer's room. "Spencer?" Freddie called out, glancing around before realizing the apartment was empty. Freddie shrugged and tugged off his clothes, throwing them on the floor.

Carly had gone to Sam's house for the night. She had driven in Sam's car while Freddie was forced to endure a silent ride home, thinking of Spencer and the date, something he had been doing all day. Why was he so concerned? Freddie was afraid that Spencer and him would go...too far.

Freddie wasn't comfortable with sex; his mother had always treated it like some taboo thing that wasn't allowed to be discussed. He had barely done more than kissed a girl, let alone do anything sexual with a guy. Spencer and Freddie's sexual relationship usually only got to second base, if that. Lately it had been nearing third, and Freddie was always too caught up in the moment to think rationally. He knew Spencer was older and therefore more experienced sexually, and Freddie was afraid Spencer would judge his ability, or worse, compare him to Socko. Socko was perfect at everything else, why wouldn't he be good in bed?

Freddie ruffled through his drawers, trying to find some clothes he could wear that night. He didn't want to wear a striped polo like he always did. He wanted look especially good for Spencer. Freddie finally settled on a pair of tan pants and a white oxford. He would wear a black t-shirt underneath the oxford. Freddie kept the oxford unbuttoned, trying to seem informal.

Freddie left the room, glancing at the clock. It was only 3:45. Freddie didn't know where Spencer was or when he planned to get home, but it was making Freddie extremely nervous. He decided to pull out his Civics homework and start working on that. Freddie hated doing homework on Friday nights, but it was the only thing that would calm him down.

Freddie's mind couldn't concentrate on his work. He kept thinking about Spencer, and even more distracting…Socko. Freddie couldn't stop thinking about that text message. Was Freddie a horrible person for deleting the message? Would Spencer find out and be mad at him? Was Freddie totally irrational for keeping Spencer from Socko? Freddie couldn't stop asking himself those questions.

Freddie was so caught up in his own thoughts that he didn't hear Spencer enter the apartment at around 5 o clock. He felt a hand shaking his shoulder lightly. Freddie jumped, spinning around in his seat. Spencer stood above, looking bemused.

"What goes on?" Spencer asked, half-concerned, half amused. Freddie shrugged, mumbling incoherently. His eyes were glued to the Pear Phone lodged in Spencer's jean pocket. The guilt trickled down the back of his neck.

Spencer set some groceries down on the counter, pulling out a few items Freddie couldn't decipher. "So, what time are we leaving?" Freddie asked, trying to keep himself focused on something else.

"As soon as I finish this fish loaf," Spencer answered, holding up some salmon. "I know it's your favorite."

Freddie nodded, turning back around to file his things back into his backpack. He then went to the living room and sat down on the couch, turning on the TV to watch Seattle Beat as Spencer cooked.

When Spencer was done, Freddie stood up, making his way over to sit at the dinner table. Spencer shook his head.

"Nope, we're going some place special tonight!" Spencer exclaimed, pulling Freddie by the hand towards the door, gripping the loaf in his other hand. Freddie couldn't help but smile at Spencer's child-like enthusiasm.

Spencer led Freddie out into the hall and up a couple of flights of stairs until they reached the top floor of the building. Spencer then opened a door opening up to the roof. It looked dazzling from the top of Bushwell. The entire Seattle skyline was visible, and the sun was still in the sky, making it look radiant.

Towards the center of the roof, a small table sat with two chairs. A candle was lit in the center of the round table, and a blanket was laid out nearby. Freddie was in awe; Spencer had really gone all out to make the night special.

"Here we are," Spencer announced, looking proudly upon the scene in front of them. Freddie let go of his hand, pausing to look over the Seattle skyline.

"It looks perfect, Spence," Freddie said, smiling at his boyfriend. Spencer grinned crookedly, kissing Freddie on the cheek.

"Perfection is the least I can do for you, Freddo," Spencer told him, leading him to the table. He set down the fish loaf and without further ado, the two started eating, discussing school and art and Seattle and beavecoons and everything there was to discuss. The sun started to set while they were in the middle of a game of Would You Rather?. Spencer glanced towards the blanket, and then back at Freddie.

"Wanna watch the sun set?" Spencer asked, gesturing towards the blanket. Freddie gulped, but nodded. This was the part he had been nervous for. Spencer stood up and walked to the blanket, sitting down, stretching his legs out in front of him. He waved for Freddie to join him. Freddie bit his lip and stood as well, making his way over to sit awkwardly next to Spencer, cross legged.

Spencer leaned back on his palms, staring at the city. "It's so amazing from up here," Spencer said peacefully, smiling lightly. "It's like nothing in the world could ever ruin this moment," he told Freddie, glancing at him. Freddie nodded, not opening his mouth. He was afraid he'd puke from the nerves.

Spencer squirmed a little closer to him until was close enough rest his head on Freddie's shoulder. "I come up here sometimes when I need inspiration, or to get away from things for a little while," Spencer admitted, sighing and closing his eyes against Freddie's shoulder. Freddie just sat there, thinking about Socko and Dean, Carly and his mother, Sam and most importantly, Spencer. Freddie could see every major concern dancing in front of his eyes as he watched the sun set on Seattle. Freddie could feel his heart racing inside of his chest. He had never felt so in touch with his emotions in his life, and he didn't know why.

Spencer leaned up and pressed his lips to Freddie's. Freddie didn't respond at first, his mind too caught up in his stress. But as soon as Spencer's tongue traced his bottom lip, Freddie lost his inhibitions. He leaned into the kiss, opening his mouth to allow Spencer entrance. Freddie felt Spencer's hand fly up to hold Freddie's face. Freddie fell into a rhythm against Spencer's mouth, massaging his tongue with his own. This territory was familiar. There was nothing to be afraid of. It was just Spencer.

Freddie broke from Spencer's mouth, kissing Spencer's jaw, sucking on it. Spencer moaned heartily, reaching a hand across Freddie's body to pull him in closer. "Freddie," Spencer murmured, his eyes flickering shut as Freddie moved to his neck, kissing the skin, making it hot and wet. Freddie then felt Spencer's hand raise back to his face, pulling him up to meet his lips in a wild burst of passion. Little sounds of content came out of Spencer's mouth, and Freddie realized he was mimicking them. Freddie felt his midsection tighten.

"Spencer…" Freddie let out in a moan, leaning back slightly. Spencer looked him in the eye, his expression full of lust. Then Spencer reached for Freddie's belt loops and pulled him on top of him. Freddie reacted by pinning Spencer's wrists to the blanket. He straddled Spencer's waist, feeling his own erection rubbing against Spencer's. Freddie grinded against him, letting out sounds of ecstasy. Freddie was sure he had never felt this aroused in his life. But Freddie tried to remind himself that this was no different than what they usually did together.

Spencer bucked his hips in pleasure, groaning. "Don't stop, Freddie…" he whispered. Freddie's breath hitched in his throat as he leaned down to kiss Spencer's mouth, biting his lower lip lightly. Spencer brought his hands to grip Freddie's back. Freddie felt himself be flipped over, and suddenly, Spencer was on top of him.

Spencer leaned down to glide his tongue across Freddie's throat. Freddie felt the bliss of it all blinding him. He tried to remember why he was so nervous in the first place. Freddie felt Spencer undoing his pants zipper. His pants were suddenly being pulled down to his ankles. Freddie suddenly felt exposed, even if he was only in his boxers.

"Spencer, I…" Freddie started, but Spencer silenced him with a heart wrenching kiss. Freddie moaned loudly into Spencer's mouth, his hands winding around Spencer's waist. Spencer sat up, staring directly into Freddie's eyes as he started to undo his own jeans.

Freddie suddenly thought of Socko. He thought of the message and the memory of Spencer kissing Socko. Freddie closed his eyes, trying to block it out. He couldn't do it with Spencer while Socko was on his mind. Freddie writhed slightly, trying to get rid of the thought. Spencer leaned down, kissing Freddie's neck softly.

"I've wanted this for so long, Freddie," Spencer told him gently, pressing his lips to the hot skin of Freddie's throat, a low moan in the back of his throat. "You have no idea how much I want you."

Freddie could only listen, hearing the words Spencer was saying to him. This time wasn't like the others. Freddie knew that now. Spencer was ready to go all the way. Spencer was going to take him. Freddie felt the panic rise in his stomach, because he realized that all he could think about was Socko. Spencer had probably said similar things to Socko. Spencer had probably been on top of Socko, professing his desire. Socko still loved Spencer. Spencer probably still loved Socko. It had happened. It was real. And the guilt and fear were tangling up in Freddie's stomach, twisting into a curl so tight Freddie felt himself break inside.

What if Spencer was letting all of his sexual frustration out on Freddie? What if Spencer was only trying to do Freddie as a way of getting over Socko? Freddie felt paranoid, but he couldn't take it anymore.

"Spencer, I can't do this," Freddie said tightly, sitting up, effectively pushing Spencer off of him in the process. Spencer straightened, looking confused and a little hurt.

"What? Why?" Spencer asked concernedly. Freddie shook his head, standing up as he pulled his pants back up.

"I'm just not ready," Freddie told him. Spencer looked down into his lap, frowning. Freddie felt his stomach knot. _I bet Socko never said no to him…_

"I understand how you feel about this Freddie, but we've been together for five months now. Are you not comfortable with me? Is that it?" Spencer asked, sounding wounded. "Do you not trust me?"

"Spencer, I trust you with my life," Freddie told him resolutely, looking him dead in the eye. Spencer smiled slightly, but then looked back down. "I just need to tell you something."

Spencer looked up, waiting. Freddie hesitated; how would he tell Spencer he creeped onto his text message from Socko and deleted it? How could he let Spencer know that Socko still loved him?

"I think you should start hanging out with Socko again," Freddie heard the words leave his mouth before he registered them. Spencer straightened, his brow furrowed as his mouth became a straight line.

"Where did that come from?" Spencer asked in a demanding tone.

Freddie wrung his hands. "I just think that you haven't hung out with him in a long time and that you should stop avoiding him," Freddie lied, rubbing the back of his neck. As much as the thought of Socko being anywhere near Spencer made Freddie want to jump off the building, Freddie had to know if Spencer was fully over Socko. It pained him to even experiment, but Freddie couldn't keep living in fear. Freddie knew he would never be able to give himself up to Spencer if he didn't know whether or not Spencer was completely faithful to him.

"Freddie," Spencer started, "I can't let myself hang out with Socko if you're going to…you know…" Spencer looked at Freddie's wrists. Freddie hid them self-consciously, feeling guilty again.

"I'll be fine," Freddie assured him. "I want you to hang out with him,"_ what a lie,_ Freddie thought ruefully.

Spencer stood up, looking away from Freddie and at the darkening skyline. He put his hands in his pockets, swaying in place slightly as he chewed his lip. Then, he glanced back at Freddie.

"Alright," he said simply, shrugging. Freddie let out a breath, and he wasn't sure if it was in relief or pain. Freddie didn't know how he was feeling. All he knew was that he needed Spencer way more than Spencer needed him.

"I love you," Freddie told Spencer, looking him directly in the eyes. Spencer watched Freddie, frowning at him. Freddie felt his heart pace quicken.

"Freddie…" Spencer said, his voice soft and loving, "you mean everything to me."

Freddie nodded, reaching over to wrap his arms around Spencer's waist. Spencer hugged him back tightly, kissing the top of his head.

Spencer had been right. Nothing in the world could ruin that moment.

* * *

**A/N:** Whoo, yay for long chapters! If this chapter was mighty confusing, I'm so sorry. I started changing my mind halfway through and went back to edit things. It's 11 here, and a school night, so I'm kind of burned out. Let me explain:

Freddie doesn't want Spencer hanging out with Socko because after reading Socko's text, Freddie is afraid that Socko is right in saying that Spencer is in love with him. Not wanting Spencer to realize his "true" feelings," Freddie stupidly erases the message in a heated moment. He regrets it and feels the guilt of holding Spencer back from his "true" happiness eat at him, which his why he can't let himself get close to Spencer because he feels as though he'll never be anything like Socko was to Spencer.

Yeah, it's dramatic, but that's what fanfiction is for. :P Review!


	5. The Visit

**Title: **iPromise

**Fandom:** iCarly

**Main Ship:** Spencer/Freddie

**Other Ships:** Carly/Sam, TBA

**Genre(s): **Romance/Angst

**Rating: **T for sexual content and language

**Warnings: **person under 18 in a relationship with someone over 18, slash, femslash, angst

**Author Note:** GUESS WHAT? Tonight's episode (iSam's Mom, which I recommend ALL of you watch) is going to be a BIG Fencer episode! Obviously, no real Fencer but after reading Dan Schneider's Fun Facts on the episode, there seems to be a lot of Freddie/Spencer interaction (but I already assumed that because Carly and Sam already had a plot together). By the way, if you guys like spoilers, head to Dan's blog (just look up DanWarp on twitter and click the link there) and check it out! It's basically a play by play of the episode and little trivia about what happened on set during each scene. It might be a little more fun to read after the episode, but it's still good to get a gist! If you don't like spoilers, I'll shut up now!

* * *

Saturday was a busy day for Freddie. That night was another iCarly and they needed to prepare for most of the day. Carly's dad was docked somewhere in Hawaii and he had internet access, so he could watch iCarly. Naturally, Carly was flipping out.

"Don't put that there!" Carly screeched at Freddie as he dropped a hula hoop on the floor.

"What? Why?" Freddie asked, stepping back slightly in fear.

Carly neared him, shaking a finger at the hula hoop. "What if I tripped over that or something? I could die! Do you want my father to see me die on iCarly?" Carly said angrily, glaring. "Do you?"

"N-no…" Freddie said, alarmed. The elevator door pinged and Sam exited, walking into the messy studio. Carly spun around to look at her, breathing like a winded rhino.

"Run, Sam," Freddie mouthed to her, slinking behind Carly to leave the studio. Once he got to the stairs, he sprinted down them so Carly wouldn't be able to follow him. Freddie had intended to run right down to the kitchen, but he stopped when he heard a ruffling going on in Carly's room on the second floor. Freddie frowned, stepping off of the stairs and walking slowly to Carly's room. Inside, he spotted Spencer with half of his body underneath Carly's bed.

"Why, hello, Spencer's butt," Freddie greeted, and he couldn't help but smile. He heard Spencer make a small groaning sound.

"Freddie, is that you?" Spencer asked, sounding relieved.

"Yeah, who else would it be?" Freddie asked, laughing, sitting down on the floor next to Spencer's lower body.

"Well Sam came up here a few minutes ago and threw my binoculars under Carly's bed," Spencer replied in an annoyed tone.

"Why would she do that?"

"I told her we didn't have any meatballs left over from the spaghetti tacos I made two days ago," Spencer said sourly, his legs moving up and down. Freddie rolled his eyes. Sam and her meat.

"Could you help me out?" Spencer asked, his voice sounding strained. Freddie nodded and moved to kneel behind Spencer's legs. He gripped an ankle in each hand and started to pull.

Spencer came wiggling out seconds later, jumping to his feet and brushing off his shirt. He held a pair of small black binoculars in his hand. He clapped his free hand on Freddie's shoulder gratefully.

"Thanks, Freddo," Spencer told him, ducking down to place a small kiss on the top of Freddie's head. He then strode behind him, heading to Carly's ice cream couch to grab a black jacket.

"What's with the spy drag?" Freddie pointed to the jacket and the binoculars. Spencer's face lit up excitedly.

"Socko and I are going to spy on this old man that lives on his street," Spencer explained, grinning. "We've always thought he was an axe murderer, and now we're gonna find out!"

Freddie nodded nonchalantly. He was surprised that Spencer had made plans so quickly after Freddie had told him to, but he was happy that Spencer was happy. Spencer must have sensed the awkward feelings emitting from Freddie, because he clicked his tongue and walked towards Freddie, pulling him into his arms.

"I'll be back tomorrow. Besides, you're going to be preoccupied with iCarly tonight," Spencer told him softly, swaying in place with Freddie in his arms. Freddie smiled into Spencer's chest, pulling back slightly to look at his face.

"Your dad's watching tonight," Freddie informed Spencer in a vain attempt to make him stay.

Spencer smirked. "Yeah, Carly's been Miss Priss about it all day," Spencer chuckled, moving his hands down to rest on Freddie's waist. "I'll watch it if I can," Spencer promised, bending down to kiss Freddie lightly on the lips in farewell. Freddie clanged to him, raising his hands up to cup Spencer's face tightly.

The door to Carly's room opened, and Carly herself stood there, joined by Sam. Freddie and Spencer broke apart quickly. A blush formed on Freddie's cheeks.

Carly let out a sound of disgust. "I can't BELIEVE you guys are making out in my room!" Carly exclaimed. Sam just laughed, throwing Spencer a thumb's up. Spencer scowled at her, obviously still peeved about her earlier antic.

Carly caught sight of Sam, and let out a harsh breath. "All of you, leave my room!" she snapped, reaching to grab Freddie and her brother and pushed them out of the room. Sam looked struck.

"What did I do?" she asked, holding her hands up.

Carly didn't answer; she just slammed the door in the three of their faces. Freddie watched Sam punch the door angrily, her hands balling into fists.

"Hey, hey, hey, let her chill for a little bit," Spencer warned, pulling Sam back. "She''s just stressed out."

"And she always takes it out on me!" Sam complained, throwing her hands up as she stalked down the stairs. Freddie sighed; was this what he would have to deal with for the rest of the night?

Spencer seemed to be on the same page. "Well, _good_ luck with that," he joked, turning around to follow Sam down the stairs. Freddie was close behind him, reaching out a hand to stop him.

"Do you really have to go tonight?" Freddie asked desperately, peering into Spencer's eyes. Spencer nodded, smiling ruefully.

"It'll all work out, Freddie. It always does," Spencer assured him, leaning up to kiss Freddie gently on the lips. Then, he pulled away, disappearing down the stairs. Freddie sank to the step, putting a hand to his forehead. Why was he such a nice person?

* * *

Freddie stayed there for a few minutes, sitting on the stair and thinking about how he was going to get through the night. He heard steps coming up the stairs. Freddie's spirits rose; it was Spencer! Expecting to see the tall man, Freddie threw his arms around the person that appeared on the stairs.

"Oh, Spencer, I knew you'd stay home!" Freddie cried out joyfully, twirling the person around in his arms. Wait…how could he possibly twirl_ Spencer _around? Freddie watched in horror as a blonde curl flew into his mouth, followed by a hand.

"Ow!" Freddie fell back to the stairs, gripping his throbbing mouth. Sam had just slapped him in retaliation of him hugging her.

"That's what you get, Fredweird," Sam replied haughtily, pulling at her shirt. Freddie didn't even say anything. He just sat there, his head resting against the wall. Sam took him by surprise by sitting down next to him. "So, what problems are you having with Spencer?"

"What makes you think that?" Freddie snapped at her, rubbing his face. He wasn't too happy with her.

Sam rolled her eyes and threw an arm around his shoulders. "I know it may seem like I don't care, and I usually don't," Sam shrugged, "but I know when my friends are upset."

Freddie looked at her, debating whether or not he should tell Sam. Sam and him had never been 'close', per se. Whenever he needed to spill his feelings out about Spencer (which wasn't very often) he always went to Carly. But for some reason, he felt extremely comfortable with Sam.

Freddie admitted to Sam about the whole Socko situation, including the text message. Sam listened, not interrupting during the story except to gag when Freddie explained what he and Spencer had been doing when he had finally told Spencer to hang out with Socko.

"Alright, that may seem complicated to you, but it's really not," Sam told him, shaking her head.

"How is that not complicated?" Freddie asked incredulously, wondering what was going through the blonde demon's mind.

Sam looked directly at him as if she was about to school him. "You're jealous of Socko," she told him simply, smirking.

"Who wouldn't be?" Freddie responded, looking at Sam like she had a third head.

"No, I mean that's the _only_ problem you have here," Sam corrected. "Your jealousy of Socko is totally blinding you from the fact that Spencer loves _you. _Only you! And if you keep this clingy chizz up, it's only going to push Spencer away," Sam finished, sitting back against the step. Freddie stared at her, his mouth agape.

"How do you know so much about relationships?"

"My mom dates a lot of guys," Sam told him, picking at her fingernails. "And a lot of her relationships end because of jealousy, Fredbag," Sam then stood up, pulling Freddie up with her. She smiled at him, a genuine smile. "Don't worry, Freddie. Spencer's a good guy," Sam said.

Freddie returned the smile, actually happy he had talked to Sam. "Thanks, Puckett," he said, hugging her. Sam hugged him back, and then they drew apart. Right on cue, the door to Carly's door opened a moment later. Carly walked out, looking blue.

"Hey guys, I'm sorry about the way I've been acting," she apologized, stepping down the stairs to meet them. "But I my dad never gets to see me do iCarly live and I want it to be really special."

"We know that, Carly. It's okay," Freddie told her, still feeling sentimental from the talk. Carly bit her lip, turning to Sam.

"Sam?" she asked, scared. Sam just leaned up to kiss Carly on the lips. The three then hugged it out and headed up the stairs to prepare for a kickin' webshow.

* * *

Freddie received another surprise in the middle of the show. While Carly and Sam were in the middle of The Idiot Farm Girl gag, the door to the studio opened. Freddie glanced to the side and then gasped loudly. It was Dean.

Carly and Sam both straightened on camera, staring awkwardly into the screen. "Please enjoy this video of a kitten playing with a meatball," Sam told the viewers, eyeing Freddie. Freddie cued the video on his lap top, and then looked at Dean.

"How did you get in?" Carly asked, walking over to him, her hands on her hips.

"The front door was open," Dean shrugged, slipping his hands into his pockets. "I didn't realize you kids were shooting iCarly, though…" he muttered embarrassedly, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Well we are, so could you please leave?" Carly asked, and Sam pointed to the door.

"Wait!" Freddie interrupted, stepping in front of the door. He surveyed his father briefly. "Do you want to watch?"

Dean looked like Christmas had come early. "You want me to watch you do iCarly?"

"You want him to watch us do iCarly?" Sam repeated in a heavy tone. Freddie whipped around to nod at her, and then glanced at Carly.

"Is that okay?" Carly just nodded, looking back at the camera. Dean smiled, moving to stand behind the tech cart. Freddie cued the camera to start back up and filmed the girls again.

"Sorry for the interruption," Carly apologized, "but Freddie's dad just waked in."

Freddie turned the camera around to point at Dean. Dean waved, smiling. Sam leaned forward to turn the camera back to her and Carly. The show finished about twenty minutes later on a very good note. Carly wasn't even upset about the fact her perfect iCarly episode had been ruined by Dean's entrance.

While Sam and Carly cleaned up from the jello fight they had had, Freddie walked down the stairs with Dean, heading into the kitchen. "So why did you come here originally?" Freddie asked, pouring himself a glass of Wahoo Punch.

Dean poured himself a glass as well. "I wanted to take you out, actually. Have you had dinner yet?"

"No," Freddie responded plainly, "The girls and I were just going to go to the Groovy Smoothie or something."

Dean nodded, looking down at his feet as he sipped his punch. Freddie knew he was going to regret this, but he asked Dean anyway. "How about you and I go to BF Wangs instead?" Freddie asked, peering at Dean. Dean beamed, setting his glass down on the table.

"I would love to," Dean said, clapping a hand on Freddie's shoulder affectionately. Freddie suddenly felt warm, like he belonged.

After informing Carly and Sam about the change of plans, Dean and Freddie took a taxi to BF Wangs, settling down to eat a nice dinner. Freddie learned more about his mother back in the day. He also found out that Dean had a huge room at his apartment in L.A full of high tech stuff from the hospital. He told Freddie that he should come down with him sometime to check it all out. Freddie agreed enthusiastically.

After dinner, Freddie and Dean walked around the city, talking about their lives. Freddie did most of the talking. He explained iCarly and all of the crazy things they had done since it started. Freddie deliberately didn't bring up Spencer. He didn't think it was the right time to tell Dean that he was bisexual and involved in an illegal relationship. Freddie figured the time would never be right for the conversation.

* * *

Freddie returned to Bushwell at around 11:30 PM. Dean was staying at the Parker-Nichols Hotel in downtown Seattle, so Freddie had went to the hotel first to say goodbye to his dad. Freddie entered the lobby of the plaza, spotting Lewbert fast asleep at the desk. Freddie rolled his eyes, creeping by him to walk up the stairs.

When Freddie got to the apartment, the door was locked. Freddie furrowed his brow. That was strange. Freddie has specifically told Carly to keep it unlocked for him. Freddie pulled out his key anyway, sticking it into the doorknob and unlocking the door. Freddie opened it slowly, trying not to wake Carly up. He closed the door gently, and then turned around towards the living room. Freddie gasped.

Sitting on the couch with his arms folded was Spencer, a look of deep anger on his face as he looked upon Freddie.

* * *

**A/N:** Cliffhanger! Gotta love them. Hope you guys liked the Seddie moment in the chapter!

I have a quest for someone - make a Fencer video. There are ZERO videos of Spencer/Freddie on YouTube. Someone needs to make one! So if you have video making abilities, you should make a Fencer video! :] Review?


	6. The Fight

**Title: **iPromise

**Fandom:** iCarly

**Main Ship:** Spencer/Freddie

**Other Ships:** Carly/Sam, TBA

**Genre(s): **Romance/Angst

**Rating: **T for sexual content and language

**Warnings: **person under 18 in a relationship with someone over 18, slash, femslash, angst

**Author Note:** Soo I thought iSam's Mom would've had more Fencer, but sadly, I was disappointed. The episode was good though, and there were a few good Fencer moments ("Would you please tell him that he doesn't need to protect Freddie from _me_?"). Can't wait until iGet Pranky, that one will be classic.

Wooo anyway, it's Monday night and I can't believe I'm starting this. I'm so tired and nobody seems to be reviewing this story anymore *sniff sniff* but I couldn't wait to write this chapter! It'll probably take me a few days to finish it, but I'm determined to keep this story up (it may become a trilogy if enough people like it). But please review! I've gotten like 700 hits so far and 21 reviews! I get sad when I don't get reviews. I think people hate the story :/.

P.S Little bit of Spencer POV in this chapter! :)

* * *

Freddie could almost see the tension building up in the room. Spencer's jaw was fixed, and he had a mean glare in his dark eyes. Freddie's hoped his confusion would dilute the icy atmosphere.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were out with Socko for the night," Freddie said, his tone surprisingly not sour, something it usually was when Socko came up in the conversation. Freddie was too startled by Spencer's appearance to really care about Socko at the moment.

Spencer stood up, pointing at the computer, his eyes still glued to Freddie. "I was watching iCarly at Socko's because I felt bad about leaving you today. Imagine my shock when I saw Dean Strauss in my house with my sister and you. And imagine how even more surprised I was to find out that you ran off into the city with Dean by yourself," Spencer said in a threatening tone, his body literally shaking with anger.

Freddie was slightly scared of Spencer's reaction, but he thought Spencer was being slightly ridiculous. Freddie just rolled his eyes. "I'm a big boy, Spencer. I think I can manage Seattle at night by this point," Freddie set his jacket down on the couch, walking behind Spencer to make for the kitchen to grab a water. Freddie felt Spencer grab his wrist and pull him back. Freddie stared up at Spencer, bemused.

"What's your deal?" Freddie asked, pulling his wrist back roughly from Spencer.

Spencer closed his eyes tightly, shaking his head. "Please tell me you're not this stupid," he managed, his eyebrows furrowed.

Freddie felt his temper rise as Spencer opened his eyes, scowling down at Freddie as he spoke. "I don't want you associating with Dean," Spencer informed Freddie tersely. Freddie scoffed.

"You're not my dad, Spencer. You can't tell me who I can and can't hang out with," Freddie retorted, crossing his arms.

Spencer looked at him wildly, laughing humorlessly. "Oh, and who is your dad? Dean? Because as far as I can tell, he doesn't give a damn about you," Spencer replied heatedly. "You heard him. He was_ going_ to come see you when you turned sixteen, and guess what? He didn't! He completely forgot about you. I know this man, Freddie, and he's a liar!"

"Shut up, Spencer," Freddie snapped, his hands balling into fists. "You don't know a thing about him."

Spencer threw his arms up as he turned away from Freddie, setting his hands on his hips. Freddie could see his head shaking back and forth. Freddie stepped forward. "I know why you're really upset," Freddie told Spencer, glaring at his back. "You're afraid I'm going to pick Dean over you."

Spencer whipped around. "That is absolutely absurd," he snarled, and Freddie felt his stomach drop; okay, maybe he had been wrong.

Spencer neared him, stopping a few inches from Freddie's face. "You want to know why I don't want you hanging out with Dean? Because he's going to hurt you," Spencer told Freddie loudly, "he's going to hurt you and there's nothing I'm going to be able to do to help you. He may have money, Freddie, and he may seem cool, but Dean Strauss is a jerk who only cares about himself. He is not your friend, and he is most definitely not your father."

"You're not in any place to tell me anything about fathers seeing as yours doesn't even love you!" Freddie shouted, his face flushed red. He watched Spencer rescind abruptly as if he had been burned. Spencer's face contorted in pain, but became emotionless as Spencer turned around as grabbed his coat. Sliding into it, Spencer turned back to Freddie, his eyes sharp.

"Fine. Go _live _with Dean for all I care. You two deserve each other," Spencer lashed out, gripping the door knob. "Tell Carly I'll be at Socko's for awhile."

That pushed Freddie even further over the edge. Freddie let out a strangled laugh. "Thanks for telling me! If you come back with herpes, now I'll know where it came from!" Freddie exclaimed, grinning as if he had just found the truth about life. Spencer just closed his eyes and opened the door, exiting the apartment and slamming the door behind him.

* * *

As soon as the slam stopped echoing in Freddie's ears, Freddie sunk to the couch, putting his head in his hands. What had just happened? Spencer and Freddie never fought. But Freddie was so much reminded of how his mother used to rebuke him that it scared him a little. Freddie hated being yelled at or being told he couldn't do something. He had gone through his entire life that way, and he wasn't about to let Spencer keep the habit up.

Freddie glanced at the door, feeling his anger ebb away as panic and remorse filled him up. Spencer was going back to Socko's…what if something happened? Freddie ran a hand through his hair. It would be Freddie's fault entirely.

Leaning back on the couch, Freddie knew he wouldn't be falling asleep any time soon.

* * *

Spencer didn't normally get angry. He was sometimes flustered, or furious, or maybe even annoyed. Very rarely did Spencer ever get severely pissed off, and it certainly wasn't ever with Freddie. But for some reason, seeing Dean standing in _his _house with _his_ sister and finding out _his_ boyfriend ran off with Dean made him more than upset.

Spencer had gotten onto his motorcycle within a minute of leaving the apartment and was on his way back to Socko's. He didn't even put on his helmet. All Spencer could hear was that one awful sentence Freddie had shouted at him. It was eating Spencer alive and he had to get as far away as possible from it.

Spencer didn't mean what he had said to Freddie; the last thing Spencer wanted was for Freddie to ever be with Dean again. But Spencer had been pushed so far past his point that he couldn't see clearly. Spencer felt ashamed, dejected, hurt and so many other bad emotions he couldn't even explain.

Pulling up in front of Socko's house, Spencer got off of his motorcycle and rushed right through Socko's front door without knocking. He slammed the door behind him, and quivered as he finally stood still for the first time in the twenty minutes since the encounter with Freddie. Spencer felt his entire body shaking.

Socko came out of the kitchen holding a pizza box, his eyes meeting Spencer's with a surprised gleam. "Spencer, what's wrong, buddy?"

Spencer took a deep breath, looking away from Socko. "Can I stay here for a few days?"

Socko put the pizza box down immediately, making his way to the front door. He put his hands on Spencer's shoulders, forcing Spencer to look at him. "Of course. But Spence, what happened? You left so suddenly that I didn't even hear you leave."

"I'm sorry," Spencer muttered, putting a hand to his forehead. "I just got into a major fight with Freddie," he explained, looking into Socko's ice blue eyes.

Socko squinted slightly, confused. "Oh. Um, what about?"

Spencer hesitated for a second, trying to come up with an adequate response. "Uh, he and Carly were, uh, blowing up shit in the microwave and it got out of hand, so I, well, uh, got upset…"

Socko rolled his eyes. "Spencer, I've known you since the first grade. You're hurting my intelligence if you don't think I can tell when you're lying," Socko put a hand underneath Spencer's chin, drawing it up. "What happened with you and Freddie?"

Spencer looked into Socko's eyes, thinking about the question. What happened with him and Freddie? Well, they had fallen in love under the worst possible circumstances and were living a lie together which had been, up until now, blissful. But Spencer obviously couldn't tell Socko that.

"It's nothing, Socks," Spencer said dismissively, pulling himself from Socko. "I don't want to talk about it."

Socko stared at him for a second, and then shrugged. "Fine. Well, there's a really good war movie on the Dingo Channel that I was going to watch…you up for it?" Spencer nodded, letting Socko lead him to the couch. They sat down together as Socko turned the channel to a very gory movie. Socko groaned and gasped at all of the right parts, but Spencer wasn't even paying attention. All he could think of was Freddie.

There were only three times in Spencer's life that he had ever really felt his heart break. The first was when his mother left them shortly after giving birth to Carly. The second time was when Carly had been upset with him about the junk yard Christmas tree and had told him she wished he had been born normal. The third was when he had accidentally burned down Carly's room and was forced to watch her cry and be miserable. But fortunately, the last two seemed to work themselves out in a way that didn't make Spencer's heart twinge when he thought of it.

The first one would always have an imprint on his heart, but now, Spencer could add a fourth to the list. When Spencer heard those words leave Freddie's mouth, he felt like his world had just turned upside down. Innocent Freddie. Beautiful Freddie. Spencer couldn't believe _his_ Freddie had said those things. Spencer knew deep down that Freddie was just confused, but still, it had hurt Spencer immensely. He didn't know how he would ever look at Freddie again.

As Spencer watch a soldier stab another soldier in the back, Spencer glared at the TV, thinking murderously about Dean Strauss. Spencer would make Freddie see how awful Dean was, even if it killed him.

* * *

Freddie woke up to a pinch on his cheek. He slapped at his cheek in an annoyed fashion as he grumbled incoherently.

"Get up, Freddie!" Carly demanded, pushing Freddie on the shoulder. Freddie opened his eyes. He was still in the living room. Freddie stared up at Carly, who was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt.

"Where are you going?" Freddie asked, glancing at the clock. It was nearly noon.

"_We_ are going to the mall," Carly announced, pulling at Freddie's arm as she spoke, "because we are going to a party tonight."

"No," Freddie protested tiredly, "_you_ can go to any party you want. _I'm _going to stay here," he pulled the blanket he had on him up to his chin as he turned from Carly on the couch.

"C'mon, Freddie; it's gonna be our first real high school party," Carly insisted, whining. "We can never go to them because of Spencer, but he's gone for a few days so he'll never know."

Freddie contemplated this for a second. Spencer would have a stroke if he found out that Carly and Freddie were going to a party with underage drinking and other similar activities. Freddie felt his stomach drop at the thought of Spencer and his wild eyes and angry voice. Sighing, Freddie sat up, rubbing his face.

"I don't think it's a good idea," Freddie decided. Carly stomped her foot.

"Fine, then Sam and I will just go without you," Carly told him, grabbing her purse from the counter before heading out of the apartment. "Don't expect me back early tonight."

"'Kay," Freddie replied, waving a hand. He was too tired to care what Carly did. Standing up, Freddie located his phone on the coffee table. Praying he had a text from Spencer, Freddie clicked it on, staring at the screen. 0 new messages.

Freddie searched for Spencer's number and typed him a text message.

_come home, spence. please._

Freddie wasn't angry anymore. He just wanted Spencer to come back home. Throwing his phone on the couch, Freddie walked towards the fridge to grab a fruit pouch. As soon as he opened the fridge door, Freddie heard his phone ping. Racing back to the couch, Freddie opened the new text message not from Spencer, but Carly.

_I'm sorry if I seemed rude before…I just really want to go to this party! I'll be home around midnight, okay? xoxo_

Freddie clicked out of the text message furiously. Sinking to the couch, Freddie put a hand to his head. With Carly gone, and Spencer at Socko's, Freddie knew it would be a long day.

* * *

**A/N:** Soo I'm contemplating several different paths for this story to take. I had one in mind when I started the story, but now I got wrapped up in all these extra details. I'll need some serious plotting time, so sorry if things seems vague/hazy right now. I'll have things figured out by next chapter.

Please review! How 'bout this? Suggest to me some sort of weird detail you'd like to see, and I will choose one to insert somewhere in the next chapter! It could be anything (like Spencer wearing Team Jacob boxers or Freddie brushing his teeth with a Hannah Montana tooth brush). Imagine, dreamers!


	7. The Drunk

**Title: **iPromise

**Fandom:** iCarly

**Main Ship:** Spencer/Freddie

**Other Ships:** Carly/Sam, TBA

**Genre(s): **Romance/Angst

**Rating: **T for sexual content and language

**Warnings: **person under 18 in a relationship with someone over 18, slash, femslash, angst

**Author Note:** Thanks for the reviews! This story is doing very well considering it's main ship (Fencer isn't very popular) but I'm nearly at 1,000 views for iP! Yay! iWLYD has nearly 5,000 and it's currently my most popular story. I absolutely love writing iCarly fics. It's like my new hobby. But anyway, we're seven chapters in and have AWHILE to go. I can promise you that. This story will be a heck of a lot longer than iWLYD (that one was only a pre-slash). That one was only 13 chapters/30,000 words. This one will be of EPIC proportions.

Also, Spam fans: check out my new story, iSpam! It's a start to a nice collection of Spam related drabbles/one-shots. Next up will be iSeddie!

* * *

Freddie had a very uneventful day, but for some reason, he felt like he was going to explode at any moment. That may because he had been alone for the entire day and longed for company and entertainment. Or maybe because he had been routinely checking his Pear Phone every five minutes for a new text message.

It was nearly nine o clock at night and Freddie still had not heard from Spencer. Freddie had literally not done one single productive thing during the entire day except pacing across the living room, waiting for Spencer to come home or at least text him back. Freddie knew he got the message. Why hadn't Spencer replied?

Sitting on the couch, Freddie turned on the Dingo Channel to watch some stupid teen sitcom, but he wasn't paying attention to it. All he could think of was his silent Pear Phone sitting directly next to him on the couch. He found himself glancing at it several times in one minute.

Carly hadn't contacted Freddie since the morning; he assumed this meant she was at the party with Sam. Freddie knew the party was being thrown by Rip Off Rodney, the item dealer in their grade. The kid was a punk, but also a friend of Sam's. Rodney wasn't a good kid. Freddie was a little concerned that Carly hadn't called him yet, but he couldn't focus on that right now. He was too busy thinking about Spencer.

Freddie stood up, muting the television and pacing back and forth, his hands twisting behind his back anxiously. He started to imagine all of the things Spencer and Socko were most likely doing at the moment. The thought of Socko's hands on Spencer's body and Spencer looking deeply into that stupid sock creator's eyes had Freddie's stomach doing somersaults.

Freddie suddenly heard keys in the door. He whipped around wildly, his heart pounding as Spencer entered the apartment. Spencer looked like a zombie. He had dark circles under his eyes and a lazy gleam to them. His skin looked pale and his clothes were ruffled. Freddie recognized them as the same from the night before; an orange and white plaid flannel and dark jeans. Freddie could probably get lost in how hot Spencer looked in flannels, but he had other things on his mind.

"Spencer?" Freddie tested, taking a step nearer towards the taller man. Spencer looked up, his eyes catching hold of Freddie's. He looked extremely tired.

"Hi," Spencer responded simply, his voice sounding distant and weak. Freddie frowned, his panic heightening.

"What's wrong?" Freddie asked, biting his lip. Spencer shrugged.

"I just came from a bar…" Spencer replied as if that explained things, throwing his keys on the table next to the door and running a hand through his dark hair.

"But you never drink," Freddie told him, confused. Spencer yawned, stretching his arms.

"I know. It was just one beer, no big deal," Spencer explained edgily, walking around the couch to head for the fridge. "I just look like crap because I didn't sleep at all last night."

Freddie felt his worst fears confirmed; oh no. It had happened. Spencer was back with Socko and they had slept together the night before. Freddie swallowed, turning around to watch Spencer grab a glass of orange juice out of the fridge.

"Spencer, look, I want to say-" Freddie started, but Spencer cut him off.

"No need to apologize, Freddie. I understand. You were mad, I was mad. Things got out of hand," Spencer said plainly, closing the fridge and turning back towards Freddie, sipping his juice. Freddie felt his anger rise. He had spent the whole day stressing about this and Spencer didn't even _care_?

Freddie wasn't letting him off the hook that easily. Walking towards him briskly, Freddie reached for Spencer's orange juice and snatched it from his hand. He then leaned over and poured it out into the drain and slammed the glass on the counter. Spencer watched this with a bemused yet cool expression. Freddie looked at him indignantly.

"I _was_ mad. Do you want to know why?" Freddie didn't let Spencer reply. "Because last night, you reminded me of my mom. You reminded me of how much she limited my life because of her stupid rules. You reminded me of how much I hated what she did to me because it wasn't fair."

"But you know what? She's gone. She's gone and I will never be able to apologize for the things I said to her," Freddie paused, watching Spencer's face become expressionless, "I said some pretty nasty things to you Spencer and I want to take them back. I can't lose you, too," Freddie told him angrily, "I'm sorry about what I said last night and I'm sorry that I hurt you. But I love you and I know you love me, too. And we're going to get over this," Freddie finished, leaning back, breathing heavily.

Spencer watched him, taking a deep breath. Then, he did a strange thing. He smiled. "I really wanted that orange juice," Spencer said quietly, looking at Freddie softly. Freddie felt the corners of his mouth twitch upwards.

"That's it? You're not mad?" Freddie asked, astounded. Spencer grinned, laughing.

"Of course not. I mean, I was last night and I was when I got to the bar earlier…but I realized everything that you just said," Spencer admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. "I _was_ a little crazy last night."

"Yeah, but the good kind of crazy," Freddie corrected, smiling broadly. Spencer chuckled, extending an arm to ruffle Freddie's hair.

"You're cute, kid," Spencer said affectionately, drawing Freddie into his chest. Freddie gripped Spencer tightly, kissing his shirt. He felt Spencer's chest vibrate in silent laughter.

"Let's never fight again, okay?" Freddie asked, pressing his cheek against Spencer's chest.

"I promise," Spencer murmured, kissing the top of Freddie's head. Freddie felt himself blush into Spencer's flannel.

There was a sudden loud knock at the front door. Freddie felt Spencer's head lift off of him, and he turned his head away from Spencer, glancing at the door.

"Spencer, let us in!" It was Sam. Freddie let go of Spencer as he followed the tall man to the door. Spencer opened the door wide. There stood Sam supporting a very giggly Carly.

"Heeey guys!" Carly shouted, smiling widely. Sam groaned as she pushed Carly through the door slightly, guiding her. Carly dropped her voice to a whisper, looking at Freddie joyfully. "Sam thinks I'm gonna fall over. Shhh!"

"What happened?" Spencer asked urgently, looking at Sam as he grabbed Carly's arms. Sam looked exasperated.

"Well, we kind of went to a party and, uh, Carly kind of had a little too much to drink…kind of," Sam ended lamely, sticking her hands in her pockets. Spencer looked at Carly, his hands cupping her face.

"Carly, are you okay?" he asked loudly, shaking her slightly. Carly giggled.

"You're such a funny piece of scrambled bacon," Carly told him honestly, falling into him and wrapping her arms around his neck, laying a wet kiss on the side of his neck. Spencer pulled back from her, looking both concerned and disgusted.

"How much did she drink?" Spencer asked Sam as Freddie rushed to Spencer's side to help lay Carly on the couch. Freddie's hand brushed Spencer's, and his heart twinged. Freddie tried to ignore it, focusing on Carly.

"I wasn't really watching, but some guy gave her a mixed drink," Sam said guiltily, putting her hands on Carly's shoulders in attempt to keep her still on the couch.

Spencer straightened, glaring at Sam. "How could you let this happen? I understand kids party in high school and everything, but there's a difference between drinking responsibly and just being stupid," Spencer chided her, leaning over Carly. Carly giggled again.

"I'm sorry! I didn't think she would drink it!" Sam complained, letting out a yelp as Carly pulled on a blonde curl. Sam swatted her. "Knock it off, Carls! This isn't funny!"

"Oh, it's very funny…" Carly disagreed, her eyes sliding towards Freddie. She broke out into a grin. "You're so cute, Freddie. Why didn't I think to date you back when you loved me?" Then, Carly's face grew sad. "Why don't you love me?"

"I do love you, Carly," Freddie assured her, "just not in that way."

Carly looked as though her laughing gas was wearing off. She frowned, putting her head in her hands. "I'm so unhappy," she murmured, swaying on the couch. Sam recoiled slightly, stepping back from the couch slowly. Freddie felt a lump rise in his throat as he looked upon Carly. Spencer sighed.

"C'mon, kiddo, let's get you upstairs," Spencer told her, reaching out to scoop up his little sister in his arms. Carly obeyed silently, wrapping her arms around her brother's neck. Spencer picked her up, her head lolling on Spencer's shoulder. "I'm going to bring her to bed," Spencer told them. "I'll be down in a few. Sam, stick around; I need to talk to you," with that, Spencer carried Carly up the stairs as she breathed loudly onto his neck.

Freddie glanced at Sam immediately, stepping forward. "Sam-"

"Save it, Fredward," Sam said sourly, heading towards the door.

"She's hammered, Sam. She doesn't know what she's saying," Freddie tried to tell her, but Sam held her hand up.

"Yes, she does. I know she doesn't love you like that, Freddie, but she still loves boys," Sam said sadly. "I'll never replace them."

"That's not true," Freddie argued. "Carly loves you."

"Carly would be better off without me. I'm no good for her," Sam said tightly, turning around to leave the apartment, but spun back around slowly, her expression rueful. "Tell Spencer I'm sorry."

Freddie nodded as Sam left. Sighing, Freddie walked towards the computer counter, sitting at one of the stools. He spun around a few times in place, waiting for Spencer to come back downstairs.

A few minutes later, Spencer's large footsteps could be heard bounding down the stairs. Freddie spun around in his chair to see Spencer walking towards him. "She fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow," Spencer said grimly. "I'm going to have to talk to her tomorrow morning…_after_ the headache."

Freddie nodded silently, drumming his hands on his pants. Spencer blew air out of his mouth awkwardly. Freddie then looked up at Spencer, staring into his eyes.

Spencer shot him a look. "What?" he asked, sounding cautious.

Freddie smiled lightly. "Carly's lucky to have you," Freddie paused, and then added as an after-thought, "so am I."

Spencer leaned down and kissed Freddie on the lips warmly, cupping one side of his face with a large hand. He pulled back, smiling.

"I think you're a keeper, Mr. Benson," Spencer said matter-of-factly, smirking. Freddie snickered.

"Why thank you, Mr. Shay," Freddie hit Spencer lightly on the cheek, and then slid off of the stool, standing up. He felt Spencer's hands on his waist.

"Seriously, though," Spencer said, "I'll try to be less snippy about Dean."

"And I'll try not to be snarky when discussing Socko," Freddie recited, holding his hand up. Spencer kissed his palm, looking deep into Freddie's eyes.

"Love ya," Spencer said childishly, winking. Freddie grinned back.

"Love ya too," Freddie said, feeling happy for the first time in twenty four hours. He planned to stay that way for at least a little bit longer.

Or, at least until the morning came around.

* * *

**A/N: **Oooh, fast update! I'm into this story. It's my favorite out of the many I'm writing currently. But I must go read the Scarlet Letter now, so I'll update again sometime this week! Review, lovely readers!


	8. The Thief

**Title: **iPromise

**Fandom:** iCarly

**Main Ship:** Spencer/Freddie

**Other Ships:** Carly/Sam, TBA

**Genre(s): **Romance/Angst

**Rating: **T for sexual content and language

**Warnings: **person under 18 in a relationship with someone over 18, slash, femslash, angst

**Author Note:** so iSell Penny T's wasn't that great :/ the episodes are getting a little lame (still love the show!). Can't wait for iDo. That one will be EPIC.

This chapter is…a little all over the place. There's a little bit of everything in it. This is my attempt to wake you all up! Some of you review a lot (and I loves you) but I really want your feedback, guys! It'll make me update faster *wink, wink, nudge, nudge*.

* * *

Spencer knocked on Carly's door bright and early on Sunday morning. He could hear his disgruntled sister grunting as she woke up. There was a feeble "Come in," followed by a loud sigh. Spencer opened the door wide with his free hand. His other hand held a tray with scrambled eggs and bacon on it.

Carly glanced up at him, her eyes squinted. "Spencer, it's 7 o clock. On a Sunday morning. Are you insane?"

"Oh, I just wanted to get a head start on this beautiful day we're having," Spencer shouted, grinning ear to ear. Carly clamped her hands over her ears, closing her eyes tightly. Spencer laid the tray down on her bed, cocking a hand on his hip as he surveyed her happily. "Oh, am I being too loud?"

"No, not at all," Carly replied sarcastically, groaning. Spencer sat down on the edge of the bed, watching Carly put the tray on her lap hesitantly. He smiled ruefully.

"That's what you get for getting wasted last night," Spencer informed her, shaking his head. "We're going to a Jamaican appreciation drum show at noon, just so you know."

"Aw, Spencer!" Carly complained, her head sinking. Spencer observed her, feeling his jokey manner ebb away as he watched her poke at her eggs sadly. Spencer frowned.

"What happened, kiddo?" Spencer asked tenderly, his eyes soft. Carly looked up at him guiltily.

"I've been having these…thoughts lately…" Carly said, shrugging slightly. She pulled a piece of bacon apart in her hands. Spencer watched her, waiting patiently for her to continue. Carly sighed again. "I'm confused about who I am."

"Everyone is at your age," Spencer told her promptly, feeling his concern fade. He was comforted by the fact that it was only a little insecurity issue and not some drug related problem or something. Spencer smiled assuredly at her. Carly grimaced.

"Sam's not. Freddie's not. It seems like everyone else knows who they are except me," Carly said, forking some eggs into her mouth.

Spencer lifted his feet from over the edge of the bed so that he could sit cross-legged, facing Carly. She watched him with a muted expression. "Although she doesn't seem like it, Sam's really mature for her age. She has to be because of her home situation. And I don't even think she has the world figured out yet," Spencer said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Freddie doesn't know anything. Believe me," Spencer said, smiling slightly. "You guys are only seventeen. You have an entire life ahead of you."

Carly nodded glumly, shrugging. Spencer leaned forward, tucking a hand into her neck to tickle the skin there. She couldn't help but giggle. Spencer laughed. "Smile, sis! That's what life is all about. _Not_ drinking to get hammered," Spencer told her seriously, leaning back. Carly nodded.

"I wasn't that drunk. I remember what happened when I came home last night," Carly admitted, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear awkwardly. "I didn't mean what I said about Freddie. I don't love him that way…you know that, right?"

Spencer frowned. The memory of Carly and Freddie making out instantly presented itself in his mind. Shaking himself, Spencer nodded. "Of course," Spencer told her, smiling weakly. Carly grinned and leaned forward, pecking Spencer on the cheek.

"I'm also sorry about sucking on your neck," Carly said, laughing. Spencer rolled his eyes, absent-mindedly touching the little red mark on his throat. He stood up from the bed and headed towards the door, turning around slightly as he did so.

"You're not grounded this time, but don't do it again, okay?" Spencer told her, giving her the parental eye.

"Cross my heart and hope to die," Carly recited, making an X on her chest with her finger.

"And if I ever find out you did do it again, I _will_ stick a needle in your eye," Spencer told her half-jokingly, half-threateningly. Carly threw her napkin at him.

* * *

Although Spencer didn't punish Carly, he most certainly made her go to the drum ceremony. This left Freddie alone for the majority of the day at the loft. Sam hadn't called or come over yet. He was starting to get a little worried. What if she had done something really stupid?

Freddie found himself extremely tired through the entire ordeal he had gone through that week. Stretching out on the couch, Freddie kicked his feet up, lounging quietly as he closed his eyes, thinking things over. He thought about Carly. He thought about Sam. He also thought about Dean and his mother, school, and of course, Spencer. While Freddie thought of all of these things, there was a quiet knock on the door.

Freddie groaned. He was _so _not in the mood to move. "It's open," he hollered from the couch, his eyes still shut.

The door opened, and Freddie heard footsteps entering the apartment. Assuming it was Sam, Freddie stayed on the couch, hoping he could fall asleep. Then, he heard a much different voice than he was expecting.

"Oh, hey Freddie. Is Spencer home?"

Freddie shot up bolt right on the couch, his eyes opening abruptly. There at the door was the one and only Socko. Freddie rubbed his eyes, wondering if he was dreaming. Was Socko actually here, in the apartment? Freddie hadn't seen him in months. What the hell was he doing here?

Freddie stood up slowly, staring at Socko like he was a ghost. Socko looked at him curiously, and Freddie realized he had just asked a question. Freddie cleared his throat.

"Uh…no, Spencer isn't here. He's out with Carly," Freddie answered awkwardly, brushing imaginary lint off of his jeans. Socko nodded glumly, looking disappointed. Freddie felt his insides burn.

Socko looked as bad as Freddie felt. His hair was sticking out at all ends, his clothes were wrinkled, and Freddie thought he saw lipstick smudged on his neck. Socko caught Freddie staring and turned away slightly, making for the wide window in the loft.

"So, um, I'll just tell Spencer you stopped by…" Freddie said, trying to get Socko to leave. But Socko just stayed by the window, looking out of it silently, a brooding look on his face. Then, Socko spun around, marching towards Freddie furiously. Freddie was scared for a brief moment, but Socko only sat on the couch.

"I need your help, Freddie," Socko said exasperatedly, throwing his hands up. "You gotta help me get Spencer back."

Freddie swallowed; this was _not_ a conversation he wanted to have. Shuffling his feet, Freddie tried again in vain to get Socko to leave. "You know, this isn't really a good time so maybe you should…?"

"Please, Freddie!" Socko pleaded, his eyes distraught. "I'm in love with Spencer and I need him. I don't know why he doesn't want me anymore but I can't stop loving him. Freddie, I know he loves me. He can't _not_ love me. We've been together since we were fourteen. You can't make that stuff up," Socko told Freddie in a rush, "sure, he's dated girls and so have I, but we always knew we had each other!" Socko groaned and put his head in his hands. Meanwhile, Freddie shoved his own fist in his mouth, biting down hard on the skin so he wouldn't scream.

How was Freddie supposed to listen to this? Freddie just wanted Socko to leave! But there Socko was on the couch, looking miserable and pathetic and hurt. Freddie couldn't just kick him to the streets, even if every fiber in his body was ready to throw him out.

"Listen, Socko," Freddie said calmly, placing a tentative hand on Socko's shaking shoulder, "you just have to move on. Spencer isn't really looking for anyone right now-" Freddie tried to lie, but his own fib got caught in his throat. Freddie hated to lie.

Socko must have caught on, because he threw Freddie an incredulous look. "That never stopped him before!" Socko shook his head, gripping the couch cushion. "Nobody will ever love him like I do. Nobody ever has. I'm the only one for him."

Anger burned in Freddie's core so hotly that he could almost feel his skin heating up. "You're wrong," Freddie snapped, wrenching his hand from Socko's back. Socko looked taken aback for a brief second, but then, he stood up, his gaze suspicious.

"You know something, don't you?" Socko said dangerously, pointing a finger at Freddie. Freddie opened his mouth several times, no intelligible sounds coming out. That's when Socko grabbed Freddie's lapel and drew him nearer, hoisting him off the ground. Freddie squeaked.

"Tell me, Benson. I don't care if he made you promise not to tell. I have a right to know who stole him away from me," Socko threatened, shaking Freddie slightly. Freddie felt his feet dangling beneath him, and he could barely breathe. Socko was strong!

"Freddie!" Socko shouted, looking panicked. "Who the hell is it?"

Freddie tried to push Socko away, but he could barely lift his arms up. "Let…go of…me…" Freddie choked out, trying to wriggle out of Socko's grasp. Socko just held on tighter. "Let go! Let…go!" Freddie tried harder, but nothing happened. Exasperated, Freddie couldn't hold it back any longer. "Me!" he shouted loudly, exhaling sharply.

Socko let go of him abruptly. Freddie massaged is neck, coughing slightly. When he looked back up at Socko, he had expected to see pure anger on his face. But Socko's expression looked torn between confusion and disbelief.

"What are you talking about?" Socko replied harshly, glaring at Freddie. Freddie backed several steps away from Socko before resuming the truth.

"I'm the one who stole him away from you," Freddie told him defiantly, his hatred for Socko rising in the heat of the moment. "And I'm the one who loves him more than anyone ever has."

Before Socko could respond, the door to the apartment opened. Freddie was wide-eyed in horror as he watched Spencer enter the loft, shouting something over his shoulder. "Yeah, just go back to the car, Carly!" Spencer turned around, not looking in the apartment as he headed towards his room. Socko and Freddie waited in silence as Spencer re-entered the living room, a bottle of Advil in his hands. Spencer glanced up, spotting a venomous looking Socko. He dropped the pill bottle.

"Socko…" Spencer started in a surprised tone, glancing at Freddie once before eyeing his best friend. "What's going-?"

"You," Socko spat, and Freddie watched his hands turn into fists. "I can't believe you left me for a teenager!"

Freddie watched Spencer's expression contort in shock. Spencer slowly circled around the couch, holding up his hands in defense. "Look, I can explain-"

The fist came so fast that Freddie didn't even see it land on Spencer's jaw. But as soon as Freddie heard the loud crack on Socko's fist connecting with Spencer's face, he was sure something was broken. Spencer shouted in agony, falling to his knees as he cupped his face. Freddie gasped, staring at Socko in pure shock.

Socko looked enraged. "You're disgusting! You're a pervert! You're just…sick!" Socko then delivered a swift kick to Spencer's ribs. This jerked Freddie into action. Sprinting at Socko, Freddie leaped onto the blonde's back, wrapping his arms around his head to blind him.

"Stop hitting him!" Freddie yelled as Socko stumbled around blindly. Then, Freddie fell off of him, landing on the floor with a thud. Socko rounded on him, breathing heavily. Freddie was afraid for his life.

"This will never work out, do you understand me?" Socko shouted at him, laughing mirthlessly. "You're just Spencer's newest art project! He'll get bored of you fast, Benson. Then, he'll be crawling back to me. So don't tell me you love him more than me. That's not possible," Socko snapped, turning back towards Spencer. Freddie watched as Spencer looked up at his former best friend and lover in pain. Freddie felt a little part of him break inside.

"I'm sorry, Spence," Socko said quietly, but earnestly. Socko suddenly looked extremely uncomfortable. Glaring at Freddie one last time, Socko stepped over Spencer and left the apartment. As soon as he left, Freddie scrambled over to Spencer's side, attempting to pry Spencer's hands away from his face.

"Let me see," Freddie told him calmly, trying to tug his hands away. Spencer resisted. Freddie let out an exasperated sigh. "My mother was a nurse, you nub," Freddie told him furiously. Spencer hesitated, and then let go of his face. All Freddie saw was a throbbing red rash on Spencer's jaw. Freddie lightly traced his fingers over it, biting his lip.

"I'm so sorry," Freddie murmured, shaking his head. "I didn't mean to tell him. It just came out. Please don't be mad at me. Please. I'm so sorry…"

Spencer let out a ragged breath, but clamped a hand on the back of Freddie's neck, drawing him closer. Freddie got the hint, and leaned in to kiss Spencer's lips passionately. Freddie felt Spencer's tongue in his mouth instantly. There was none of the polite tip of the tongue trace on the lips. There was no gentleness. It was raw emotion and lust, and Freddie had never felt so invigorated in his life by the moment.

He didn't know why Spencer was kissing him like this. Freddie didn't know how Spencer's jaw wasn't completely destroyed. He wasn't sure how Socko beating him and finding out made Spencer turned on. But Freddie wasn't about to ask questions, especially with Spencer doing, ohmygod _that _to him.

Spencer was attacking Freddie's mouth with his own. Freddie pushed his tongue onto Spencer's, feeling the texture and the moisture. Freddie moaned, his hands gripping wildly at Spencer's shirt. Spencer pushed Freddie onto the wooden floor, pinning him down as he lowered his lips to Freddie's, kissing him wildly. Freddie felt Spencer straddle his waist, and he could feel Spencer's groin rubbing up against Freddie's jeans. Freddie bucked into Spencer, creating friction so heavy that he could almost die right then and there.

Spencer let out a low groan, tonguing Freddie's neck roughly. Freddie let out several moans of appreciation, wrapping his legs around Spencer's waist. Spencer pushed himself into Freddie, and Freddie saw stars. Reaching up to tangle his fingers in Spencer's hair, Freddie pulled Spencer up to his level and kissed him savagely, licking Spencer's mouth. Spencer bit down on Freddie's lower lip, pulling it towards him. They both moaned in each other's mouths.

Spencer then slid down to Freddie's waist, staring to undo Freddie's jeans. Freddie let him, running his fingers through Spencer's hair as he did so. Spencer got the jeans unbuckled and he pushed them down Freddie's legs, revealing his boxers. Freddie was almost writhing in anticipation.

Spencer slowly rubbed Freddie through the fabric of his boxers. Freddie let out a loud moan, his voice raising about three octaves. Spencer started to quicken his pace while Freddie bucked into his hand, aching for contact. Through with the teasing, Spencer dipped his fingers into Freddie's boxers, pulling them down to Freddie's knees. Freddie felt his erection harden even more as Spencer looked at Freddie's most vulnerable spot. Freddie let out shaky breaths as Spencer eyed him hungrily.

"Spencer…" Freddie groaned, letting out a sharp breath. Spencer glanced at Freddie, his eyes clouded in lust. Then, Spencer leaned down and took Freddie into his mouth.

Freddie felt so many pleasurable feelings at once; it was as if every good thing that had ever happened to him had suddenly bubbled into one huge feeling. Ecstasy coursed through Freddie as he felt Spencer's tongue tracing the sides of his shaft slowly, exploring the new territory. Spencer then sucked on the head, his eyes never leaving Freddie's. Freddie couldn't stop trembling, his entire body going into overload. He wasn't even making coherent sounds. Just one prolonged stream of moans and groans.

Spencer lifted his head a tad and then stuck his tongue out, teasing the top of the head with the tip of his tongue. Freddie could barely hold back any longer. "Spencer!" Freddie cried, shaking as he felt himself rise. Spencer quickly resumed his position, taking Freddie in whole. Freddie came into Spencer's mouth, shuddering in joy as he did so. Spencer leaned back, swallowing it. He coughed slightly as he sat back on his knees, trembling. Freddie was breathing so heavily his entire body was heaving.

Spencer then quietly pulled up Freddie's underwear and jeans, rebuttoning them as Freddie shook in pleasure. Then, Spencer hovered over Freddie, raising a hand to brush Freddie's hair from his eyes as he stared down at him softly.

Freddie stared back, still slightly paralyzed from the intense jubilation that had just occurred. He just let Spencer brush at his hair, his nose brushing against Spencer's. Then, Freddie asked him the burning question he had been holding back. "Why?" Freddie whispered, his voice shaking.

Spencer didn't smile. He didn't smirk or come up with something clever to say. He just stared down into Freddie's eyes, his expression pained. "Because if Socko goes to the police station tonight, this will be the last time I'll ever see you," Spencer whispered back sadly, his lower lip trembling slightly. Freddie just breathed, watching Spencer. Spencer brushed his lips against Freddie as he gazed into his wide eyes. Then, he tucked his face into Freddie's neck, trying to slow down his breathing. Freddie wrapped his arms around the older man, stroking his hair absentmindedly.

For some reason, Freddie wasn't afraid. Freddie didn't care about Socko or the police, or Carly or Sam or Dean or anything else.

All Freddie cared about (and ever would) was the man currently intertwined with him on the floor of the apartment.

* * *

**A/N:** Okay, that was a big chappie, no? Didn't intend on that happening, but of course, these things do happen in a writer's world. I won't give anything away, but don't you fret about Socko right now. We don't need to worry about him until a little further down the road.

Review?


	9. The Guardian

**Title: **iPromise

**Fandom:** iCarly

**Main Ship:** Spencer/Freddie

**Other Ships:** Carly/Sam, TBA

**Genre(s): **Romance/Angst

**Rating: **T for sexual content and language

**Warnings: **person under 18 in a relationship with someone over 18, slash, femslash, angst

**Author Note:** To Violmaster - This story (iPromise) is the sequel to another story (iWon't Let You Down). So the entire background of how Spencer and Freddie got together is right in that story! :) You can find it on my author page!

Can't wait for iDo! And thanks so much for bringing this story to over 1,600 hits! That makes me so glad :)

* * *

Freddie and Spencer had a very stressful week. Every phone call made Freddie jump and Spencer stare at it in fear. Every knock on the door had Spencer sprinting to his room and Freddie cowering in the kitchen as Carly would answer the door bemusedly. They could barely walk ten feet without wondering if the police would suddenly jump out of nowhere and pin them to the floor.

After a week, however, it had become apparent that Socko hadn't gone to the police at all, which meant Spencer had overreacted in his impulsive yet passionate moves towards Freddie. Freddie still felt the tug in his stomach and the rapid beating of his heart whenever he and Spencer were alone, even if they were only watching television. Freddie could not get the feeling of Spencer's mouth on his groin out of his head. He had never felt anything like it in his entire life, and it had been the most amazing thing.

Unfortunately, Spencer barely touched Freddie in the past week. Freddie was annoyed by this, but understood why he was so reluctant. At first, Freddie thought it was because of the whole third base thing, but it wasn't. Spencer was just concerned about Socko.

"I just don't want to take any chances," Spencer had said distractedly while he worked on a sculpture. Before Freddie could ask him to elaborate, Spencer accidentally set his sculpture on fire, which prompted him to let out a stream of curses as he ran for the frequently used fire extinguisher.

School wasn't Freddie's best friend either. Senior year was proving to be harder than he would have ever thought, plus he got a ton of homework. Freddie often stayed up past midnight reading Beowulf while Spencer painted in the corner. He also caught himself watching Spencer paint more than he read, so Freddie stopped reading in Spencer's room so he wouldn't be distracted. Which meant less time with Spencer.

Once the week was up, Freddie felt himself growing weary of work. He was glad it was Sunday night and he could zone out on the couch while Spencer cooked something in the oven. Carly sat at the table doing the homework she had put off until the last minute. Everything seemed calm enough.

There was a knock at the door. Freddie glanced at Spencer apprehensively, as Spencer stared at the door fearfully, the food in his hands dropping on to the counter. Carly rolled her eyes.

"You guys are both drama queens," Carly complained. "Just get the door, Freddie."

Freddie relented and stood up, slowly walking over to the door. He reached for the knob slowly, hesitating. Then, he opened it. Relief washed over him when he spotted Dean standing outside the door, smiling brightly.

"Hello, Freddie," Dean said cheerfully, stepping into the apartment. Freddie closed the door behind him, smiling.

"Hey," Freddie replied, turning around to face him. "What are you doing here?"

Dean didn't answer at first. He waved once to Carly, and nodded at Spencer. Spencer made no inclination that he had seen the greeting, for he ignored Dean and continued making dinner. Freddie scowled at the back of his head before looking back to Dean. Dean shrugged at his question.

"I haven't seen you in a few weeks," Dean said, rubbing his hands together. "I wanted to take you out tonight."

"Freddie needs to stay here, Dean," Spencer interrupted;_ that_ had certainly gotten his attention. Spencer was looking up towards Dean haughtily. "It's a Sunday night. Freddie has school tomorrow."

"Oh, don't be such a priss, Spencer," Dean replied, waving a hand. Spencer scowled, looking away. Freddie couldn't help but laugh slightly. Dean took this as encouragement. He turned to Freddie. "I'll have you back here before ten. Or is that too late for mommy over there?" This earned Dean another glare from Spencer, who looked positively seething. Freddie swallowed.

"Maybe some other time…" Freddie told him, but Dean shook his head.

"I'm going back to L.A in two days," Dean replied sadly, sticking his hands in his pockets. "I won't be back until Christmas, I'm afraid."

Freddie cast Spencer a long look, his eyes pleading. It was only for one night. Freddie had had a great time with Dean when they had hung out before, and he wanted to get to know his father as much as he could. He felt like his mother would have wanted him to.

Spencer sighed, catching Freddie's eye. He finally shrugged. "Have him back by nine thirty," Spencer warned Dean, eyeing him over the chicken he was roasting. Dean grinned.

"Good man," Dean replied, nodding. Spencer just rolled his eyes and put the chicken in the oven. Carly waved to Freddie, but Freddie had his eyes on Spencer.

"I'll see you tonight, Spence," Freddie called to him. Spencer ignored him, his back turned to the door as he slid the chicken into the oven. Freddie frowned, hurt. He thought Spencer was going to be more lax about Dean. However, he could hardly dwell on it because Dean was pulling him out of the apartment.

"Geez, Spencer's a buzz kill, isn't he?" Dean remarked, leading Freddie to the stairs. Freddie shook his head.

"He's just protective of me," Freddie responded proudly, pushing his chest out a bit. Dean gave him a strange look. Freddie realized how that must have sounded. Freddie coughed, trying to save himself. "Uh, you know, because of what happened to my mom."

Dean just nodded. Freddie let out a breath of relief as he followed Dean out of Bushwell. As soon as they got onto the street, Freddie spotted a black Porsche on the side of the street. Freddie's jaw dropped when he saw the keys Dean pulled out of his pocket.

"_That's_ your car?" Freddie exclaimed in awe. Dean smirked, nodding.

"She's my baby. For up here, anyway," Dean told him as they strode across the street. "I've got an BMW down in L.A."

Freddie could hardly wrap his mind around how much money Dean must have owned. Freddie slid into the car, smelling the leather and expensive scents. Dean started the car, backing up slightly before driving off into the city.

"I thought I'd show you my place here in Seattle," Dean said, taking the road to downtown Seattle. "It's not that far away from Bushwell," he added offhandedly. Freddie felt a twinge in his stomach. What was Dean trying to say? Freddie didn't know much about parental laws and guardian stuff, but what if Freddie had to live with Dean? Would that mean he'd have to leave Spencer? Even if Dean's apartment was the coolest thing in the world, Freddie would never in a million years choose it over the Shay loft. Besides, he didn't even want to imagine the look on Spencer's face if Freddie told him he was moving out.

A few minutes later, Dean pulled up in front of an even taller building than Bushwell. He handed his car keys to a valet as Freddie stepped out of the car, staring up at the tower of an apartment building. He wondered if Dean lived on the very top.

Dean clapped a hand on Freddie's back, leading him to the front doors. "Shall we?"

Freddie nodded nervously. He felt incredibly anxious and he had no idea why.

After an intensely quiet elevator ride to the 15th floor, Dean led Freddie to apartment 1512. It looked normal from the outside. Maybe it was just like the Shay loft?

Dean opened the door, letting Freddie step inside first. Well, it wasn't like the Shay loft, but it was_ nice_. A large living room was complete with a clean kitchen and nicely set dining room. It reminded Freddie of his old apartment across the hall from Spencer and Carly, except this living room was much, much bigger.

"Do you like it?" Dean asked, sounding anxious. "I didn't want to get a huge apartment because I didn't think I'd be staying here long, but you never know…" Freddie just nodded. He didn't want to say anything that would give Dean the wrong impression.

Dean stood there awkwardly, surveying Freddie closely. "Do you, uh, want to see my tech stuff?"

That put some life into Freddie. He looked around eagerly, brightening up a bit. "Yeah, of course!" Dean beamed, pulling Freddie towards a room that Freddie assumed was a study of some sort. Sitting on the desks were numerous pieces of technical equipment, all things too expensive for Freddie to even wish for.

Freddie looked at Dean dumbly, awestruck. "_How_ do you afford all of these things?"

Dean just smirked, shrugging. "Doctors make a lot of money," he offered, but changed the subject, pointing to a thin machine with the Pear logo on it. "I just picked up that baby earlier today. It's the new PearPad."

"Wow," Freddie murmured, tracing a finger over the back of the silver surface. "Spencer has one, but it's not the newest one. Besides, he never lets me play with it," This was true. Spencer barely let Freddie breath around his PearPad.

Dean slipped his hands into his pockets, smiling. Freddie flipped over the PearPad, clicking the button to turn it on. As soon as he did, bright orange text flashed across the screen in big bold letters. The text said HAPPY BIRTHDAY FREDDIE!

Freddie furrowed his brow, confused. "Um…my birthday is in February. You're either ridiculously late or extremely early," Freddie sighed, wondering what he would have expected. How would Dean remember his birthday? But Dean laughed suddenly, shaking his head.

"February fourth. You think I'd forget?" Dean asked, pretending to be offended. Freddie just stared at the screen, watching the words bounce all across the surface of the PearPad. Was Dean seriously giving him one of these? It must have cost over 1,000 bucks! Dean stepped forward, his laughter ceasing. "This is my way of starting to make up for not being with you on your birthday for the past sixteen of them."

Freddie put the PearPad down on the desk, stepping back a bit. "I can't accept this," Freddie told him honestly, crossing his arms. Dean smiled slightly as he took the PearPad in his hands and slipped it into a black case.

"Believe me, Freddie, this PearPad doesn't even start to make up for what I've done," Dean told him ruefully, shrugging. "I bought this for you. I know money can't buy love, but this is my way of letting you know that I want to be a part of your life now. I may be just some random guy you just met a month or so ago, but to me, Freddie, you're extremely important. You're my son."

Freddie let the words sink in, feeling the knot in his stomach tightening. Talking to Dean made Freddie realize how much he missed his mom. Looking at Dean, Freddie could start to see how similar the two of them looked. Their eyes looked exactly the same. This man was truly his father. Freddie looked at the ground, shuffling his feet slightly. "Well…thanks," Freddie mumbled, not looking at Dean. "For everything."

Dean clapped a hand on Freddie's shoulder, squeezing him tightly. "Anything for you, Freddie," Dean told him sincerely, his eyes twinkling.

* * *

Freddie was back at Bushwell by 9:30, just like Spencer had wanted. After promising he'd fly down to visit Dean sometime before Christmas, Freddie left his father in his Porsche. Walking past Lewbert's desk to go to the elevator, Freddie gripped his new toy tightly in his hands, secretly eager to play with it.

As soon as Freddie got to the apartment, he was nearly ripping the PearPad from it's container. The elevator doors opened, and Freddie instantly exited it, grinning as he fiddled around with the black container in his hands. He was interrupted by somebody clearing their throat. Freddie looked up, spotting Carly with her hands on her hips.

"Hey, Carls," Freddie said, so happy about receiving his PearPad and having a dad that he leaned over to peck her on the cheek. Carly just stared at him. Freddie frowned, glancing at the clock. "I got here on time. Why are you so-?"

"Spencer locked himself in his room as soon as you left," Carly told him, crossing her arms. "I tried to get him to come out but he just used some lame sculpture excuse."

Freddie glanced at Spencer's door. It was indeed shut. He groaned. "Why is he being so bratty about this?_ I_ was upset when he went out with Socko but I didn't lock myself in my room because of it," Freddie complained, setting his PearPad down on the couch. Carly rolled her eyes.

"Please. You_ cut _yourself back when Spencer and Socko were still together," Carly responded harshly, but then clamped a hand over her mouth, gasping. Her eyes widened. Freddie just looked away from her, hurt. Carly rushed forward, wrapping her arms around Freddie's neck. "Oh Freddie, I'm so sorry I said that! I didn't mean to!"

"It's fine," Freddie told her, pushing her back slightly. He often thought about that dark time in his life when he used to injure himself because of Spencer and Socko. The faint scars on his wrist still held the painful reminder.

Carly bit her lip, looking more distraught than angry. "I'm just so worried about him, Freddie. He never gets this depressed…I don't know what it is about your dad that makes him like this!"

Freddie didn't know either. But he had a feeling he would soon find out.

Bidding Carly goodnight, Freddie made his way to Spencer's bedroom, the PearPad laying forgotten on the couch. Once he heard Carly's feet retreating up the stairs, Freddie knocked on Spencer's door hesitantly. "Spencer?"

There was a shuffling sound coming from the other side of the door, but the door opened widely as Spencer appeared. He was already in his pajamas. Freddie couldn't help but smile at the duck covered pajama pants.

Spencer's eyes lit up, and Freddie felt the familiar tug in his gut. "Hey, Freddo," Spencer murmured, leaning down to kiss Freddie soundly on the lips. Freddie kissed him back for a moment and then pulled away. Spencer backed up, letting Freddie into the room. Freddie spotted Spencer's laptop open on the bed. Kicking off his shoes, Freddie went to his set of drawers, pulling out some pajamas as Spencer sat back on the bed, pulling the laptop into his lap.

"How was Dean?" Spencer asked nonchalantly, glancing at Freddie over the top of his computer. Freddie turned back to Spencer as he slipped into some sweatpants.

"Good. He got me a PearPad for my birthday," Freddie exclaimed, his enthusiasm getting at him once more. Spencer quirked an eyebrow.

"Your birthday isn't for another five months," Spencer replied blankly. Freddie was about to explain Dean's reasoning when he caught sight of something on Spencer's desk. It was his old law textbook that he kept from his 72 hour escapade at law school.

Freddie straightened, frowning. "Why were you reading that?" Freddie pointed to the book. Spencer followed Freddie's finger, and then glanced at him quickly.

"No reason…" Spencer told him vaguely, but Freddie was already flipping open to where Spencer had dog-eared the page. "Freddie!" Spencer exclaimed, jumping up and sprinting over to his side. He slapped a hand on the cover of the book, closing it with a bang. But Freddie had already seen the heading of the section Spencer had been reading.

"Guardianship laws?" Freddie asked, looking up at Spencer in confusion. Spencer threw his arms up resignedly, stepping back over to the bed to lie down. Freddie followed him, pausing at the end of the bed. "Why were you looking at-?"

"Because I don't want to lose you!" Spencer shouted, sitting up to look at Freddie indignantly. He then looked down, wringing his hands together. "Freddie…I'm not your guardian."

"I know that. My aunt Sharon is. But we worked out a deal, remember?" Freddie reminded him gently.

Spencer gripped his hair, pulling at it deliriously. "But now that Dean is back in your life, he can easily become your guardian!" Spencer threw himself back down on the bed, gripping his pillow tightly. "He will always legally be your parent. And since your Aunt Sharon doesn't make you stay with her, he could easily convince her to give you up. Freddie…" Spencer paused, raising his head from the pillow, looking at Freddie with wide, scared eyes. "If Dean wanted you to live with him, you'd be gone in less than a week. There's nothing I can do to stop him."

Freddie sat down on the bed, watching Spencer tremble. It had been awhile since he had seen Spencer this shaken up about something. Reaching out a hand, Freddie touched Spencer's arm, rubbing it slightly. Spencer refused to look at him.

"Spence…" Freddie started, leaning forward to catch Spencer's eye. "You are the only person I want to live with."

Spencer sat back so abruptly that Freddie's hand fell off of his arm. "That doesn't matter-"

"Yes it does!" Freddie cried, leaning even further to grip the sides of Spencer's arms. "Look at me. Please," Spencer turned slightly, his eyes meeting Freddie's. Freddie took a deep breath. "I…I don't think you care about Dean forcing me to live with him."

Spencer raised his eyebrows, confused. "Excuse me? You think I don't care?"

"I do think you care," Freddie said, pausing. "But I think that you're more afraid that I'm going to choose living with Dean…over you," Freddie rephrased, the truth finally sinking in. It made sense. Spencer's actions and his resentment of having Dean over. It made perfect sense. At the moment those words were uttered, Spencer gazed up at Freddie pleadingly, his eyes wide.

"Freddie, I…" Spencer murmured, shaking his head. Then, he sighed, and it all came out in a rush. "He just has so much more to offer you than I do. He could get you through any college you'd want to go to. I barely have two pennies to rub together next to him, and I-"

"Spencer," Freddie stopped him, placing a hand over his mouth. "Will you shut up?"

Spencer just looked at him, his expression a mixture of pain and fear. Freddie didn't like seeing Spencer so riled up about something so trivial. Freddie leaned forward, moving his hand away from Spencer's face as he pressed his lips to Spencer's.

Spencer didn't respond at first, but then he sighed and kissed Freddie back, his tongue running across Freddie's lower lip. Pushing him down upon the bed, Freddie broke contact with Spencer, staring at him in the eyes.

"I love you," Freddie emphasized, looking at him deeply, "and there's nothing that anyone could do to make me want to leave you."

Spencer's hands found Freddie's and he gripped them tightly. "Freddie…"

"No. That's the truth," Freddie argued, leaning down to kiss Spencer soundly on the cheek. He then let go of Spencer's hands and brought his hands up to rest on Spencer's chest. His legs lay tangled with Spencer's. Spencer moved his hands to Freddie's back, gliding them across the top lightly.

All Freddie knew was that it would take a hurricane to rip him from Spencer's arms.

* * *

**A/N**: :) I've been ending the chapters on a happy note lately…don't get used to it! Muahaha. Enter intense DRAMA.

By the way, for all you Spam fans, I have a YouTube account now with a few Spam videos I made :) My account is ellebell16. Look me up! Maybe I'll put up a Fencer one!


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